the weather's fine. So am I

At work

2007-03-08T12:43:00.000+08:00

Finally found the time n energy to update. Been unusually tired... bz with work n what-not. I'm a workaholic =) and I'm proud to be one. A Levels results are out... did ok. so-so la but I'm alright with it. Though some stuff were unexpected. Bah. Now it's time to move on to a place I've been looking forward to since the day I entered pri sch... lol. BUT I haven really decided, confirmed, chop chop on wat I really wanna do/study leh. btw, congrats to those who've done well. If not, it's ok... life still goes on. Life will be MUCH MUCH better. Come to think about it, A Levels is OFFICIALLY over. OFFICIALLY!!! WOOHOO!

Ok, nothing much is up with me except I've finished watching all TEN seasons of Friends. Remember the wonderful show they used to show on Channel 5? Yup, I've completed the whole series. Super nice!! I love it! I would have bought the whole series if I have the money but u know, I don't print cash. Moving on to watching Monk now! Not bad, pretty funny!! but I like Friends better =)

My contract's coming to an end, so gonna be jobless soon. If anyone has any good recommendation, tell me!! I need a high-paying job!! cause I'm going Japan n HK n maybe china! Cool right? At the age of 19, I am FINALLY going to Japan!!! Disneyland, here I come~

okok... crapping now cause nothing much to say. Just tt I don't mind working, my colleagues are nice, I like them except for that one or two but wat to do? I'm a fussy girl, not everyone pleases me. wahahha!

I'm going back for lunch, haven eat. This update is just to keep this blog alive n to let some ppl know I'm still up n kicking! Btw, birthday's coming soon! I'm going to be 19... OH SO OLD!

P.S: I miss sch though... just the part where I sit in the canteen/chatroom/library/classroom/amphi crapping n playing with my friends NOT the mugging part. I'm looking forward to uni life but I cannot imagine myself listening to lectures n doing tutorials again. I'm soooo NOT suitable to be a student.

P.P.S: I miss my ny/rj friends!! call me!

Post As

2006-11-19T11:43:00.000+08:00

GCE A Levels Cambridge Examination has FINALLY ended on 15 Nov 2006. Will remember this day till my last breath.

Ok... so basically I had a rather short examination period as compared to many others esp the Econs S and Lit S peeps. Think abt it, I can take a 10 years Europe tour and by the time I've returned to Sg, they would still be having exams... Sigh.

Anyway, I'm not having as much fun as it's supposed to be because YES. I'm having post-exam blues. I'm sick I know. I dun really know wat's there to do except mope around the house, read, watch vcd, surf the net and get gastric flu -.- I haven even exactly pack my stuff yet because I need boxes and I can't bear to clear my econs stuff because they're so precious but for physics? I've dumped them all at some corner of the room... LOL

Haiya, damn sian la. ppl still having exam so nothing much to do. Oh, btw... I bought something from USA through sgspree. Threadless is having a USD$10 holiday sale for most of their tees. Quite nice, unique I would say so go check it out. Basically almost everyone's organising a spree from threadless due to their sale.

Back to As... It was u noe... shit? The standard's super different from O Levels. All I can say is whoever said A Levels would be easier than school's prelim is bullsh*tting. Seriously. And nope, NJ n AJ aren't trying too hard by setting their papers to sky-high standards because A Levels CAN BE tt difficult. Like maths paper 1 and Physics. Econs essay was bombed too. MCQ was damn confusing. I heard fm paper 1 was rather easy though but who can trust those fm weirdos... haha. To think I though gp was terrible. Nah, that was just the start. The rest were equally disgusting.

In conclusion, I shall continue to mope around the house in order to try to get over the effect of post As and get a job. Basically no one has replied my mails. Sad. I wanna go out!!!!!!!!!

Raw wounds

2006-11-06T17:19:00.000+08:00

I'm having A Levels Maths Paper 1 tmr. Wish me luck. Bleah.

You know right, some wounds are so deep that they never seem to heal. Just a slight prick and it hurts like hell. Sigh...

After As! after As! AFTER As!!!!!

2006-10-27T21:54:00.000+08:00

(My hiatus is NOT working) I'm so sick of Maths, so sick of stats. I've been doing non-stop stats to the extent that when I was stuck at one pathetic tys qn, I grabbed my stuff, stomped out of the school library and went home after being there for erm... only 2+ hrs. And that is so not me cause when I do maths, I'll do until the sky drops down. BUT I'm SO SICK of studying!!! Can't wait for As to be over. (Btw, I still have not touched my maths tys since this morning.) As usual, here's a list of stuff I wanna do after As. It's going to be LONG.

1) Sleep. I need sleep. I wanna sleep. Just LET ME SLEEP!

2) Finish my application for that 2 pathetic US uni that I've been putting off. Anyone knows how did I make use of opportunities available in JC to prepare me for uni life? Or can anyone see any hidden talent of mine that I've missed out in my 18 yrs on Earth?

3) Apply for debit card/ beg parents for credit card (tough luck but it nv hurts to try)

4) Go shopping @ VivoCity! That's so many stuff I wanna buy! Shoes esp.

5) Shopping @ Orchard. It's a ritual remember? Btw, Far East has got really gd jeans. Not too ex too =)

6) How can I miss out Marina Square?

7) Apply for driving lessons!! Anyone wanna wants a ride? I promise minimum scratches!

8) Attempt to finish my music theory or else my mom will nag.

9) Cycling! I plan to make it a everyday activity. At least it's something to keep my heartbeat going at a healthy rate. I should go learn yoga, so tt I'll be less grumpy, more calm. (Liyi n Cathy!!!! East coast yar?!)

10) Make a purchase through sgspree. I don't care what. I just wanna try online shopping! I'm so loser -.-

11) Guitar lessons!! Anyone willing to provide for free?

12) Find a job. Get tuition kids. Maybe piano kids... though they're equivalent of terrorists. I can't decide if I want internship (i.e letting them exploit me because it'll look gd on resume n they can't afford permanent photocopy-er) OR go apply Video EZY. I mean, u get to watch free shows everyday, how much better can life gets?
Maybe Esplanade too! I miss that place.

13) Finish reading the stuff on my bookshelves. They're collecting dust! Poor babies...

14) Sats II? Damn PHYSICS!

15) Go Japan/HK/Taiwan! I luv Asia, yes I do. Dunno if friend n friend still wanna go Taiwan or not leh.

16) Read up on Uni majors so that I can finally decide wat I want for my future. (Life's still boring after As)

17) Meet up with friends! Gd ones! Severe contacts with bad ones! Hahaha, just kidding la.

18) Eh, Mandy C----, if u seeing this ah, maybe we should make that cruise thing come true. We've been talking abt it for YEARS/AGES/CENTURIES/EONS~

19) Go Shao's house to stayover so tt I can finally have VCD/DVD marathon! Goong!!! (oops, Full House still with me)

20) Watch all the movies/shows that I've been missing because of g-ddamn As. Devil Wears Prada! Death Note! Lake House! I have like tons of vcds at home tt I haven watch. Poof.

21) How can I miss this out. KBOX anyone?!

22) Go pick up a sport. Like a gd, cheap sport. No golf, no water skiing/wakeboarding, no tennis ( Tennis lessons are BLOODY expensive), no sailing. TMD. Maybe I'll stick to jogging, cycling, badminton, soccer with small neighbourhood boys cause they not so fierce... hahaha. Ultimate frisbee! I think I'll try wakeboarding once I'm rich.

23) Be a good girl n learn to cook so tt my dad will stop harping on the fact that wo2 jin4 bu4 liao3 chu2 fang2, chu1 bu4 liao3 ting1 tang2 (something along the line tt I can't present myself well and I can't be hid in the kitchen because I can't cook. Watever la). I will cook delicious stuff for my future prince charming so tt I'll gain the upper hand over him and then poison him to death... wahahah!! Ok, I'm crapping.

24) Be a even better girl n learn to use the sewing machine in my house. I have a sewing machine, might as well use it.

25) DIY DIY DIY something. I can't decide wat but just something k.

26) Clean the room. It's a mess! Better yet, reconstruct my room. I shall build my own table. Carpentry!!

27) Reconstruct my wardrobe. I'm donating them to the salvation army. Clear the old, welcome the new =)

28) Go club. I should at least go once just to see how it's like. I gotta do something BAD once in a while right?

29) Continue those CIP tt I've stopped due to As and maybe sign up to be a volunteer @ children's home/SPCA.

30) My personal fav. Make big money just by selling my notes/tys/guidebooks/papers/ compiled notes to the karang guni man or any desperados. Look @ GP n Econs man... I think the karang guni man will have to make 10 ten trips up n down just to bring them down to his truck. I hope I earn @ least 20 dollars to make up for the few hundreds that I've paid. I'm making a loss but only in monetary terms =) Either that right or I'll hold a bonfire and invite people over and we can all burn our stuff together! Ran2 shao1 ba~~~ I hope those go to hell, esp the tys-es.

Ok, enough dreaming, back to mugging =( Only stupid charles can still game at a time like this. @#*&$#@&!$

P.S: I think the term "stupid charles" is stuck in some of our classmates' vocabulary.

I'm an RJ girl!

2006-10-25T21:08:00.000+08:00

Well... really supposed to be doing econs now but I can't help it but wanna put this down. Eunice has kept me updated with the latest news in town about my fellow rafflesian this morning. Yup, that girl. The gepper, humans scholar, PM bk prize winner, daughter of XXX, etc. Ya lar, HER la.

First of all, wanna know something? I'm not an elite (so says the girl who went to tons of premier schs, WOW). Not because I'm the pathetic less than 5% of the cohort in RJ who's taking 3 subs but because I don't see myself as one. I'm ur average heartlander who can't really speak gd english (OMG!), or at least most of the time I'm either rolling my tongue too much or slurring my words as often pointed out by my oh-so-angmoh brother. Limited vocab too. Btw, my mommy n daddy aren't some big shot either. Like I read in one of the many blog entries tt responded to the saga, my dad's probably part of the "most educated taxi drivers" group. Yup, he used to be a taxi driver after being retrenched during the 1997 AFC n he holds a degree mind u. Is he too old to rejoin the rat race? I don't think so but many do. Please leh, my dad leh! The man who can do a maths qn in less than 10 steps when the given solution is like a page. BUT! the point is, so what? He's nearing retiring age. That kicks him out of our endless, mindless, pointless game. So obviously tt means ur elitist era is erm... maybe a span of 30 yrs? From the time u sit for tt stupid GEP exam to the time when u get sick of ur job and moving into early forties when people despise u of ur balding head and upcoming menopause. At the end of the day, as we luv to put it in econs: In the very long run, we're all DEAD.

For my darling schmate, u can't blame her for tt elitist mind of hers. Look at that environment that she has grown up in, I bet many of my friends agree with her that it's the elites that's ruling the country and if you can't live with that, get out. We are moving into age of globalisation, when money IS making the world go round. U can't blame others for loathing people from premier schools either. I hate them too. Alright, I was like that too when I was in ny. I nv really like neighbourhood sch kids. Thought they were too rowdy... u noe the lians n bengs stereotypes. However, I've turned the table around n look down on people with tt elitist mindset instead. Who said people who are not academically inclined will not be able to succeed? Maybe it's difficult in Singapore, considering the fact that we lived on meritocracy... haiya, it's all in the blood/surname la. If ur dad/mom's gd, u have ur unlimited resources to make u into a genius. I do believe talents are inheritary though but then again, there's always Yamaha to turn to.

There's alot of discussions abt this elite thingy going on like how scholarships are only based on grades n teachers' recommendations. What abt character, virtues, morals? That's right. What about those? When I look at some of the people I know, I can tell they're definitely scholar materials, know why? Perfect grades, good records, wonderful achievements, it all boils down to how you plan ur path. You want scholarship? Choose good CCAs la, aim for leadership positions lor. Do alot of CIP la, get the hours, super impt. On the other hand, here's some other adjectives to describe a few of them, arrogant, self-centred, selfish, grades-oriented, no friend, only acquaintances. Everytime I talk to them, I only wanna ask "Who do you think you are? Snap out of tt disgusting mindset of yours." Also, how well do the teachers know them? Of course all teachers luv straight As students la, who doesn't? But personally, I think my physics teacher know me better than some of my classmates. Why? Cause I failed physics n I'm stuck with him until A Levels. The time I spent with my teachers, definitely more than the rest. As we all know, some people are only at their best in front of their teachers n I'm definitely guilty of that. So... as we can all infer, we are branded by our results.

Does that mean meritocracy is bad? It all depends I guess. I'm not exactly sure. I of course cannot deny that I've benefitted from this whole system. If I didn't go RJ, u think I can go US for econs trip? Nope. If I didn't go nygh, think I'll be so motivated to do well during Os? Maybe not. On the other hand, this meritocracy thingy makes my life boring. Wanna know why? My friends never change. My social group always consist of the same people. So many nyps ppl at nygh. So many nyps cum nygh ppl at RJ. So many nyps cum rgs/ri at RJ. Bet if I went HC, sama sama la. Everywhere on campus, there's someone I find familiar. Damn sian leh. Of course I wanna keep a certain group of friends but I wanna meet NEW people. New, different! Which is why as I've often said, we are very much grouped into our very own class by the time we reach puberty. Worse ah, u get scholarship, work for gvt, u're back in the same crowd. Ok, not worse, but see how u like it la.

I can't really speak for people past my age but for a mere lowly teenager like myself, this rat race has gotta change its path some time in the near future. We've already surpassed that "dun need nobel laureates, we want productivity!" age. Many of us think the States is the dreamland or utopia. Why? Cause they have freedom which is erm... very much not tt true. They have very strict laws regarding adolescents and they do have tt tyranny of minority like how we succumb to tyranny of PSC scholars. Freedom of speech, yar. Strong cultivation of individuality, yar but I prefer love n peace =) US is everything we're not n yearn for but the truth is (for most of us), we will never be able to uproot that hierachy mindset from our puny brains. We will always classify ourselves as the lowly heartlander, the big shot; the foreign worker, the expatriate; the COE, the cleaner; the neighbourhood sch kid; the top sch kids; the 4 subbers, the 3 subbers; the artsy-fartsy, the science geeks; the JC (watever -sian u call urself), the poly kiddos; the honours degree holder, the diploma holder; the fresh grad, the retirees; the taxpayer, the tax burden. We have very much lived with racial harmony in our secular state for the past 41 yrs, it's time to move on to exterminate this new game of class discrimination.

I realised I really should stand up for many of us. We are NICE people!! Cannot discriminate us just cause we RJ one! Wah lau... ok. Got some very irritating, insensitive, mindless people but I can tell u in a very li3 zhi2 qi4 zhuang4 manner that I'm nice. I don't really have alot to be proud of but I'm proud of the fact that I'm a good person.

Ok, here's my 2 cents worth of thoughts. Still got some la but gotta be censored, I still wanna keep my blog one. Can come find me to discuss though. We can complain n bitch from day till night =) Gotta go back to Econs -.-

P.S: Reminder, I was the Pres of my CCA in sec sch u noe. HoHoHo! But so what? Yar, SO WHAT?

P.P.S: Actually what's the moral of this story, as I've learnt frm Ger, let's just all shut up n keep our beloved thots within our own community

Hiatus

2006-10-17T21:02:00.000+08:00

Going into hibernation. I'm panicking... trust me. I am!

Btw, I can't stand e freaking haze. I feel terrible. BAH BAH BAH.

How UNCOMMON!

2006-10-09T16:39:00.000+08:00

Was surfing through websites of universities in US. Here's what I've stumbled upon... From the University of Chicago leh!!

You may have noticed that we do things a little differently here at Chicago. Uncommonly strong academics, an uncommon number of student clubs, gargoyles staring at you from all directions on our uncommonly gray gothic campus. In the same vein, we have our own version of a college application, the Uncommon Application.

I couldn't help but want to mock at their UNCOMMON sense of humour =) Apparently they're a school filled with Nobel Laureates (those that can say "I think" in their Econs essay according to my econs tutor -.-). It's a great school really but that sense of humour of theirs... definitely off tangent. Ok la... sorta cute but u noe, it's the kind of humour that leaves u not knowing whether to laugh or cry. Kinda like the people from my class who's applying there... lol. Just Kidding ^_^

Btw, last fri was officially the last day of school! =) Ok la... i'm VERY, POSITIVELY sure I'll miss some of my current classmates and the teachers too! Ms. Ngin very nice! I got a knife that says "Econs sharpens your mind" which is SORT OF true in a way. At least it sounds better than the fork which is supposed to be some poking thingy. Mr Lee being Mr Lee the Physics teacher couldn't be bothered. I'm seeing him all e way until As anyway -.- BAH. Didnt get to see much of Mrs. Lim (my very meek CT) except to pass her money and she kinda saw the erm... loud side of me (unfortunately). Basically the day was just taking photos and slopping around, making use of the very last chance to pon lectures. As usual, my cam got something wrong. Watever la.

Love vs Hate

2006-10-02T20:50:00.000+08:00

How is it that you can hate someone who loves you and yet love someone who hates you?

Narcissist

2006-09-26T18:17:00.000+08:00

I'm a narcissist. Definitely. I've proclaimed self-love so often on this blog. Btw, this is my THIRD post of the day. WOW. I must be really bored. Was reading through past autographs that people wrote for me. Hmmm... I miss everyone! Ranging frm Jiayin, Jac, Limmy, yy to even val n xt. I wanna cry... I think I may even end up missing my current class despite how much I seem to dislike them. I don't hate my class. I'm just detached. I dunno... we don't click? I'm weird? Let's just say I'll miss alot of them. It's coming to the end of JC life. I'm GLAD. However, it'll be weird to not really have a fixed class anymore.

There's this thing abt autographs though. We tend to write nice stuff. I find it extremely difficult to write to someone I'm not closed to... it's weird. I keep getting remarks like "U're smart, nice and fun to be with." hmm... how many of those are true? Ok... I'm not judging my friends/classmates but u noe wat I mean. This patronising thing tt's always there. Bleah. I'm still thinking if I wanna get people to help me write. Maybe some la... then I have to do it discreetly so that I can just get the people I want to help me write? Maybe dun bother la. Just take photos can le... OH... this is awkward. BAH. Wo bu xi huan zhe zhong dong xi. I think part of this autograph thing is to make me feel gd abt myself cause I noe people will write nice things abt me (even if they're lies)

I appreciate honest opinions. Yar, I do get upset when people say negative things about me but I'll get over it la. Then I'll improve on it or just laugh if off for stuff I can't change (Like how people always say I look fierce n dao. I'm NOT. It's just my face)

To emphasize on my nacissism, I enjoy reading my own blog. Gross right? But I like it... lol. I also like to read autographs people write to me. HeH HeH. I also secretly think I'm very mature n well-liked.HOHOHO.

P.S: The well-liked part is crap la. But I do think I'm very mature =) NOT OLD.

P.P.S: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO VAL! May u be more mature n less sadistic!

Chalet

2006-09-26T15:17:00.000+08:00

I'm back frm class chalet. The only thing I can say is.... SIAO LEH. I dun understand guys. Just to say I was totally bored to tears that night... and I couldn't go cycling cause I was broke n sleepy. BBQ food was nice though... and got ppl cooking for u is a nice feeling. Just needa sit there n wait for food to come... HeHEe. There's even someone to remove carcinogen =) Personally dun really like bbq food cause I ALWAYS get sore throat after tt. But...

to conclude the night, guys have this "secret" obsession or I would say fascination with soccer. Bleah. Btw, I've learnt to play Risk. Yar... but I suck at it. I'm not suited for this whole domination thingy la. I'm a giver =)

Haiya... this is boring. I wanna blog interesting stuff.

Quote of the day II

2006-09-26T14:45:00.000+08:00

"Once a FM student, always a FM student"

Eww... does that mean once a Rafflesian, always a Rafflesian? That means once a Nanyang girl, always a nanyang girl (doesn't sound tt bad though... lol) I was an AJCian for 3 months too leh... how ah? Ok la... crapping here but the above quote also implies...

Once an irritating asshole, always an irritating asshole.

(You guys should come up with ur own =D)

My Wish

2006-09-24T12:42:00.000+08:00

My BIGGEST wish at the current moment (other than those go uni, get rich, be happy, etc.) is....

GO KBOX!

Blessing in disguise

2006-08-30T23:07:00.000+08:00

Hi people! I'm still alive despite the crazy mugging that's going on.

Yes, I do advocate the notion that life is not just about studying but you know what? This is Singapore, so too bad.

As usual, I've been thinking alot. This time I've come to a conclusion. I'm not suited to be in rj AT ALL but I've learnt the most there (Lessons u nv get to learn in texts I mean. As if I did learn alot frm syllabus -.-). U'll be surprised how adversity can become a blessing in disguise =)

To all the "chao muggers" out there, jiayou ba! To those slackers, get a grip. STUDY!

Something for everyone

2006-08-03T19:15:00.000+08:00

Ok... here's the english version. Took only a few sec to find it. It may not be the original one but this is the version which I like the best.

Children Learn What They Live (1969)

BY DOROTHY LAW NOLTE

If a child lives with criticism,

He learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility,

He learns to fight.

If a child lives with ridicule,

He learns to be shy.

If a child lives with shame,

He learns to feel guilty.

If a child lives with tolerance,

He learns to be patient.

If a child lives with encouragement,

He learns confidence.

If a child lives with praise,

He learns to appreciate.

If a child lives with fairness,

He learns justice.

If a child lives with security,

He learns to have faith.

If a child lives with approval,

He learns to like himself.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, He learns to find love in the world.

which do u relate to?

2006-08-03T19:01:00.000+08:00

I found the following on the web. It's in chinese so hope u guys can read it. It's nice =)

你給孩子什麼？(By Dorothy Law Nolte)

批評中長大的孩子，責難他人

敵意中長大的孩子，喜歡吵架

恐懼中長大的孩子，常常憂慮

嘲笑中長大的孩子，個性羞怯

猜忌中長大的孩子，容易嫉妒

羞恥中長大的孩子，自覺有罪

鼓勵中長大的孩子，深具自信

寬容中長大的孩子，能夠忍耐

稱讚中長大的孩子，懂得感恩

認可中長大的孩子，喜歡自己

分享中長大的孩子，慷慨大方

誠信中長大的孩子，理解真理

公正中長大的孩子，極富正義

尊重中長大的孩子，懂得尊敬

信賴中長大的孩子，不但信任他人也信任自

己友善中長大的孩子，不但愛他人也愛自己

Questioning the sanity of a not-so-typical rj student.

2006-07-27T19:25:00.000+08:00

I always thought one of my best achievements in rj was the ability to keep my sanity despite all those crazy frenzy around me but apparently not.

currently detached from my class. Or rather, I have no idea myself. School feels different all over again.

Dropping fm makes me damn detached physically and emotionally. wondering around aimlessly in the school library or sitting alone studying makes me feel damn out of place. So is consistently appearing outside the staffroom. I think I can apply for PR there. I think I'm not concentrating too well on my studies. Or else why would I have the time and energy to think about these "not so impt" stuff.

Felt rather touched during assembly and PE today. The VP n my PE teacher have so kindly reminded us to let go when we feel too stretched. To remember that life is not just about books, we need to eat, sleep and exercise too. Drinking too much chicken essence, energy drinks and coffee/tea is BAD for health. So is lack of rest (duh!). However, a thought just cross my mind. If life's not just about books, then what's life for me now? Somebody please enlighten me.

Another one of those sian sian post. Argh.

Life's a showbiz

2006-07-21T14:50:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I feel as though I'm in a showbiz. Everything's fake. I think I've just lost myself in this world.

What I say doesn't reflect what I think. What I think may not even reflect what I believe. What I believe may not be what I feel and what I feel is not even reflected on my face. I'm bloody irritated by hell lot of people. and I do mean LOTS. I don't know what I'm doing these days. I can't stand being around people who can't cope with stress. Stop spreading those stress bugs around. It's fuckingly annoying. I may choose to ignore stuff but that doesn't mean it won't get to me. I'm not even enlightened for goodness sake. I just have no idea who to share those stuff with.

Being happy everyday is goddamn tiring. Am I even REALLY happy? So sick n tired of all that serious stuff that's going around and making a stupid joke out of everything like some immature clown. I have no idea what's going on with my life. I can't even love myself. To think I just told someone not long ago "U gotta learn to love urself before others can love u".

I absolutely cannot stand my behaviour now. There's no place for me to release that rubbish within me because I'm supposed to be a young adult now. To make things worse, I shun away from people when I'm depressed and then I'll feel unloved. What rubbish is this?! I never knew how to tell people what are my problems exactly and how do I feel. I've somehow trapped myself behind the wall that I've built. I wanna break open my brain and see exactly what's going on in the puny brain of mine. Don't even talk about the heart, I don't think I have one.

I feel like some idiot when I get annoyed by people. I get even more upset when people give me that "why are you behaving this way" look. I'm totally oppressed, repressed, suppressed and definitely depressed. I'm not some rebel but can't I just stop being nice and good. Why must I even think about others for everything that I do. Why can't people think for themselves too. Yar and when people ask me, "who has not offended u yet?" with that amused face, half the time I just wanna slap their faces. When I'm piss, I'm piss. Don't test water and joke about it.

Life is totally showbiz like these days. Patronising people whom I don't even wanna look at. Listening to stuff that I don't even wanna know. Making casual yet unsincere conversation is NOT my thing. I don't even wanna xu1 han2 wen4 nuan3 with people I couldn't be bothered with. Concern about people who couldn't even be bothered with you or just indulging in self-pity or just plain dumb. I'm sick of the guessing game and the competition too. I just want THE friends. At this rate, I think may end up friendless soon.

Not mugging today. Sick of it. Just wanna be left alone or praying that some of my better friends will call me to go out. Get me out of here. Actually the stuff that I wanna do are just read (novels, not notes), shop online, watch vcd, play the piano, go kbox and sing my lungs out, BADMINTON! or just sleep. Even playing squash sounds alot better than study, go sch.

Wo Bian Le

2006-07-15T22:06:00.000+08:00

I've changed. I've attained enlightenment.

Zen... woohoo!

P.S: Everybody must go listen to S.H.E's new song!!! I don't really care if u can see the mtv but u MUST go listen to the song =)

Lalallal

2006-07-11T15:10:00.000+08:00

I'm throwing tantrum... hmph. Do Not Disturb.

觸電 by S.H.E

2006-07-07T16:09:00.000+08:00

ok la. I just wanna post this up 'cause I really like the song =)

Bad day ^_^

2006-07-07T15:47:00.000+08:00

It's amazing how a day can get worse when u already thought it was bad enough. Yup. I'm so amazed that the only thing I could do was laugh (and cry) it off. As pessimistic as I am, sometimes the teeny optimist in me can surprise me and make me feel so much better for e rest of the day. It felt so ridiculous and dramatic that I ended up crying and laughing. No matter how bad the day has been so far, prepare for more and u'll realised how ridiculously funny it can turn out to be =)

First heard this song when I was in my bro's room, secretly using his notebook. Then got a pleasant surprise and saw the video on shao's blog. Think it can be the theme song of today for me. So shall put it down. It's nice to put up mtv on e blog. Takes up space... lol

Survey. For YOU to know me better~

2006-06-29T23:02:00.000+08:00

I hate this... but since i'm tagged by cyy n i'm sick of wat i'm doing... might as well...

10 Favs:

Fav colour: blue, black, white. I think I'm rather attracted to red too... lol

Fav food: My ah ma's mee sua! n fried rice too =)

Fav song: Yuki No Hana by Mika Nakashima

Fav movie: eh... currently it's Notting Hill (partly cause the songs are so nice!)

Fav sport: frisbee! badminton! I still like bball once in a while. Netball's nice too

Fav season: Spring~~

Fav day of e week: Saturday. ALL TIME FAV

Fav ice-cream flavour: rum n raisin, cookies n cream. I'm NOT a fruity person unless it's durian!

Fav book: Gotta be Jodi Picoult's "My Sister's Keeper" (for now i.e)n Totto-chan n Just Friends. I'm not really a classic person too

Fav cartoon: Disney's!

9 currents:
current mood: Maths SUX.
current song: Shania Twain's From This Moment (Super nice!)
current book: Divine Secrets of Ya-Ya Sisterhood
current subject studying: NONE. CT's just over. Let me rest.
current thought: I need sleep
current time: 11.12pm
current toenail colour: healthy colour
current boyfriend: my pillow
current wish: I better not screw up my As

7 Firsts:
1st best friends: shldn't say
1st crush: eh...I can't remember...
1st movie: I think it's Lion King. Or Edward Sissorshands. (Johnny Depp!! WOO~~)
1st piercing: dun have. i have virgin ears.
1st handphone: Nokia 8250 (Classic phone)
1st sport: Tennis (cause my stupid bro loves it but I suck at it)
1st pet: terrapin.

Lasts:
Last cigarette: Hmm... was there ever a first?
Last drink: Water
Last car ride: This morning
Last crush: Johnny Depp =) He's weird but I like~~
Last movie seen: Casanova on e plane
Last phone call: Ah Ma.
Last sms: Cathy
Last song played: Michelle Branch's "All You Wanted"

Have you evers:
Dated one of ur best friends: No. I dun date girls.
Broken e law: Hmm... do u think it's wise to say it here?
Been arrested: Of course NOT!
Skinny-dipped: not skinny, can't dip
Been on TV: once I think when they came to my sch and I ended up in the backgrd somehow
Kissed someone u din noe: I hope not.

5 things you're wearing: shirt, short, specs, and u noe...
4 things ive done today: 3 hrs of maths. shopped. eat. pack!
3 things I can hear rite now: mp3, keyboard, my dad's snore.
2 things u cant live without: sleep. food. water too
Things u do when ur bored: go crazy
5 people to do this quiz: no one will wanna do la. but guess it's the usual. lian, man, xx, shao n wenling!

Smile =) U're being assessed.

2006-06-29T20:27:00.000+08:00

I'm back from my US econs trip(Yes wenling, I went to US for econs trip and not for studies or watever u were thinking about)! Common Test 2 is OVER! one more prelim to go before A Levels... time flies... bleah. CT was kinda shit. Don't really wanna talk abt it. Damn. Went shopping after CT (it has become a ritual) and bought nice stuff! Bodyshop hairbrush is so nice!!

Speaking of which, u guys know the GEM thingy right (is it GEM?) The one for good service. You noe... one third of the time , I dun wanna give a card to them. Half, I feel like writing "U SUCK!" but I do wanna say one third of the time, the service was good. Not exactly top-notch but good enough to feel like a well-respected customer. Service quality has been deteriorating (never high in the first place...) It's damn pathetic that we have to keep emphasizing on service quality to the extent of doing some stupid campaign like the GEM thingy (sometimes I feel bad for sg, we always have weird campaigns like romancing singapore, courtesy campaign, speak good english campaign and what not, it's as though we're a bunch of robots that need to be programmed to know what is gd and what is not). Isn't it supposed to be like the most important component of the service sector? Btw, we aren't even trying to make service quality here top-notch but trying to bring it up to a certain standard. Which very well implies, service quality is BAD.

Local salespeople are incorrigible. They judge people by appearance. Yaya... first impression counts. I've been deprived of quality service tons of time due to the fact that I'm still a student, esp when I'm in sch uniform. WTH. They treat students as though we're bad customers. I don't get it. It's not as though the probability of us buying something from the shop is much lower than those aunties. AND STOP ROLLING YOUR EYES AT US WHEN WE TELL U "we're just looking." We do have the intention of buying stuff alright. Our spending power may be lower but we are just as willing to spend the money that we have.

I'm totally speaking from own experience and from POV of a student. Let me just list some stuff down.

1) Whenever I go to KFC n buy 2 piece chicken, I always, ALWAYS gets the breastmeat. I hate breastmeat. Why can't I get the thigh or the wing? Stupid ppl always give lousy stuff to students cause we often don't have the courage to complain or voice our preference. Whatever happened to variety? 2 piece means 2 different parts right? I've gotten 2 pieces of breastmeat before or one with lotsa bones. WTH. UNFAIR TREATMENT! and most people dislike the breast part INCLUDING MOI.

2) KBox service SUCKS to the core. Yar, I like going kbox not because I like the place, I just like singing and partyworld is either too far or it's in a community centre where the ambience isn't all that great. The people are always DAMN BLOODY EYE-ROLLING SARCASTICALLY RUDE. There was this once when I went for the lunch session at TOA PAYOH's outlet. The lunch was supposed to be some chicken and fish thingy and I couldn't catch what the girl was saying so I politely (ok, not that politely) said, "erm... could you repeat that." Then she gave me this totally irritated look and said "chicken or fish la" which was totally not what she said but I bet it was because she couldn't pronounce the watever fish or watever chicken. For goodness sake, the way you prepare the chicken or fish is like a huge factor in deciding what you wanna eat. It's like fried fish/ black pepper chicken and sambal fish/ stewed chicken. If I can't take chilli but I like fish, I would definitely get the stewed chicken but if it's a choice between the former, of course fried fish. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE. Btw, Kbox lunch sux. Cine outlet is fine but amk n tp? YUCKS. And the charges always differ whenever I go. It's like they make me buy the most expensive lunch and if I have some voucher or whatever, they make me eat some lousy thingy from delifrance which is COLD n most probably overnight. What kinda service quality is this? I'm damn upset with kbox, dampens the mood u noe. Haven been there for quite some time, so don't know, don't care.

3)Whenever I visit Poh Kim, the vcd shop these days, I feel discriminated. The sales personnel follow me EVERYWHERE. at least 2 of them so that they won't lose sight of me when I move on to the next aisle. They have security camera for god's sake. It's like I'm a potential threat to the shop. How is that so? Especially when my bag's in the sch's locker? The way they follow me all the time makes me just wanna leave the shop. I can even feel them breathing down my neck. Don't you just hate it when they follow u around so closely that they may just bump into you if you stop walking?

4) Ppl (esp managers) hate it when students study at cafes/ fast food restaurants so they give u poor quality service. The one at toa payoh library's delifrance was the worst I've ever met. I was supposed to meet xx to study there. The guy wanted to come take our order, we told him hold on. came back, we were still not ready cause we very stingy, trying to see which is the most "worth it" drink to buy. He was damn irritating, kept asking us if we were ready to order. IF WE ARE READY, WE WILL CALL FOR YOU. YOU CAN STAND NEAR US SO THAT YOU WILL BE THERE WHEN WE ARE READY BUT STOP COMING UP TO US AND ASK. Plus he had that "that's it?" look when I placed my order at the cashier (cause when we wanted to place our orders, he wasn't there. Smart guy. Also because we wanted to buy their "SELF-SERVICE" pastry). What's worse was that I don't understand why I had to pay for the service charge when I'm basically serving myself when I buy the pastry. STUPID GUY. I hope his lips will get some infection and swell or something so that he won't smirk when I reply "Yup, that's it." Partly also my fault cause I didn't wanna make a fuss over the service charge then. But the more I've thought of it, the more unfair it seems. He totally despised us cause we were obviously going to stay there for long to study. Yar lar, we love to take up space in that pathetic delifrance.

5) Trust me, sometimes... service at kopitiam is much better than those in restaurants or whatsoever. Kopitiam meaning coffee shops, not the wat "KOPITIAM" food court. The people are warm and friendly. In addition, although the place's usually not that clean but they do try to keep their food as hygienic and their food is not of some astronomical price with terrible service like some places. Example? Crystal Jade. Yar lar, being poor students, we wouldn't order as much as those rich taitais but HELLO? We are still patrons I believe. Those taking orders (the aunties in black la) always have that despising tone "xiao mei (ah girl), wat you wanna order?" Then they take damn long to give you your seats, take your orders, glare at you when THEY bump into you and when they pass you the bill, they literally look down on you when u count the dollars and cents that you have cause u aren't eligible for credit card. In addition, they take EXTREMELY long to return ur change that you just wanna leave the place without the change. I suspect they wanna take those as tips (yar right, as if I will wanna give it to you)

You know, I've never been much of a unreasonable customer. In fact, I've been rather passive, courteous to them, treating them as though the sales personnel is always right. From now on, I'm going to hold on to watever consumer rights that I'm entitled to cause I'm so sick n tired of poor quality service. Service is not a high-end sector in singapore but it's very impt. Good service are not only deserved for those paying tons of money. Good service are expected everywhere. Good service makes me wanna patronise the shop again but BAD SERVICE? forget it. You definitely won't see my face again (oh... lucky u =P)Even if I don't pay service charge, could u kindly give the basic respect that I believed I deserve even though I'm young and poor and may not end up hiring you one fine day.

Yar, I know I like to complain but don't ya find it frustrating when u're faced with poor service? It totally spoils your day.

End of blog entry. It's obvious I've been through a rough time during CTs... LOL. Will talk more about my US trip next time though ppl are already bored to tears from it.

Hello Hollywood!

2006-05-31T21:48:00.000+08:00

I'm flying off to US in less than 24 hrs.

Goodbye S'pore! Hello the land of unlimited rights n freedom n crazy celebrities!

dun miss me too much =)

P.S: I'm still packing... damn.

Find The Way by Mika Nakashima

2006-05-26T23:48:00.000+08:00

Yup. She's the NANA gal. Apparently the next superstar of Japan and she's only 22! She's damn gd la...I like her voice range plus she's pretty too. Her songs are nice... esp those in her "BEST" album.

Chose to post this video up cause I think it's quite different from the usual music videos plus this song is really nice, not the best but it's more indepth. The thing about Jap songs (or any other song that is of a different language) is that u could have no idea wat they're singing but u get to interpret it the way u like it.

Songs by her that I recommend: Yuki no Hana, Stars n Glamourous Sky(frm NANA)

Btw, I was watching some HardGay thingy frm Japan that one of my friends gave me the link to. It's weird la but funny. Kinda explicit though.

Last day of the first semester!

2006-05-26T23:06:00.001+08:00

It's the beginning of the long anticipated june hol!!!!

1) I'm going to the States frm 1-11 Jun. Not exactly looking forward... but will try to have fun. Want anything just tell me. But NO PROMISE.

2) I'm going to mug my ass off regardless of where I am

3) Clear my mind of trivial stuff n concentrate on studies. I wanna be ultimate mugger! Shall learn frm friend.

Pts onwards are just stuff that I feel I shld do to improve myself as a person... LOL

4) I shall attempt to live up to my image of being strong n independent (courtesy of eunice lim) =)

5) I'm so NOT going to be cynical of true love n marriage

6) I shldn't even be cynical of anything

7) I'm going to clean my room (yes... resolution frm 10 yrs ago)

8) Improve my english. Let my chinese die.

9) I should learn to be more friendly, accomodating n improve my EQ.

10) Learn to love every single one of my classmates.

And life continues.... in e mugger way...

Liquidity Preference Theory

2006-05-14T22:02:00.000+08:00

I'm darn proud of myself. Finally completed my econs essay which I've spent 1 day studying for and one night+one day doing. Conclusion? I think I wrote crap but nvm la. At least I've completed it. Was searching through the net and found interesting econs articles regarding the controversy of the LPF. Hmm... I think I like econs =)

Short post. Study hard ppl!

Endless Story by REIRA starring Yuna Ito (NANA OST)

2006-04-29T22:06:00.000+08:00

Great video. Love the song. It's the original version of Saya's Xiang Nian Ni De Ge. Found out about this song while watching NANA. It's a wonderful movie! I can't really say how much I like it. The storyline's almost the same as the manga though the manga is more detailed. However, the movie gave a different feeling altogether despite it following the manga closely.

Anyway, back to the song. It's a beautiful song. Feel is good. The MTV's really beautiful. I really really REALLY like it! I'm so gonna get the OST of NANA. When I have e money tt is.

The song is a must-hear, the movie is a must-watch and the manga is a must-read (for girls la...). Btw, Glamourous Sky by Mika Nakashima is gd too!

Sian diao

2006-04-29T15:12:00.000+08:00

My mom just scolded me for posting the previous entry cause she said wat if it cause a huge rah-rah n the principal wanna see me or watever. And I shld stay away frm trouble since exams are coming up so I've made some changes to protect the identities of those tt I want AND dun wanna protect. Sigh... I need a certain level of freedom of speech in this democratic country n too bad i can't protect my own identity.

Funny librarians

2006-04-29T14:09:00.000+08:00

I had gone through the weirdest, suay-est but funniest day of my life yesterday, within a short span of 2 hrs odd. (This is gonna be a LONG entry)

Firstly, since it was friday, a group of us (mainly 5, namely, ZZZ x5) decided to watch a movie in the sch library (yes... the prestigious SHAW Foundation Library) but cause usually the range of movies available frm the library is rather limited, we brought in our own. In Her Shoes... chic-flick. so grab one of the stations la but cause we felt bad about bringing in our own movie, we went to borrow one movie (Dead Poets' Society) from the library n gave the librarian one of our ez-link to let her know one station is taken.

Got 5 stations. Last station was this loner watching dunno wat show la, listening through HEADPHONES. First station was this group of STUPID, INCONSIDERATE J1 students (told ya I hate J1s) who was watching dunno watever show. 2nd was 2 girls watching "About A Boy" I think. Then came 3 boys who took e 4th station. Yar so basially all the stations were taken up. First station got dunno how many ppl then obviously their volume was like crazily loud. Then the rest of us, u noe...cannot hear so brought up the vol too but we can't beat them. Basically their noise level dominated the room la. We damn pathetic lor... 5 of us squeeze in one small station not making out wat e ppl are saying. Last loner got piss, gave up watching, scolded first station before stomping out. We couldn't be bothered since none of our business.

Within 3 mins, one of the librarians came in. Started ranting... blah blah blah saying we're damn noisy, the boy complained, we're inconsiderate, etc. She scolded the first station first, then the second station saying they're the noisest, she can hear their movie playing, etc. Then she went out, but since none of us can be bothered with her, she came in again scolding us, adding that she's actually very busy. Then she came over to our station, asking us how come there's so many of us. Then she saw Cameron Diaz having sex with her sister's bf in the movie, the scene was tt the sister caught the 2 of them. They got piss with each other, basically cameron diaz was half naked la (I mean who'll have sex with clothes on -.-) She asked me is the movie brought in from outside, I said yes n showed the case to her. Then she pointed to the dead poet society n asked me what's tt, so I told her we borrowed it which is true FYI. She then started ranting about why is our group so large, etc. And I bet she was staring at the screen where Diaz was just basically walking around in a shirt with underwear (or without, not sure, weren't watching) Room got silent, then amazingly, the vol of e movie got louder n this is the most classic one. Just when the librarian was watching the movie, our fav Diaz shouted into the camera,

"SHUT UP, U STUPID FAT PIG!"

Straight in her face man! Everyone burst out laughing, or rather trying hard not to laugh but were still giggling. Librarian got a shock n even more piss, she chased us out. It was damn funny la... I luv camerona diaz from tt very moment, it's so fated. She shouted to her wat all of us were thinking. Anyway, she kept saying we lied to her about watching Dead Poet. HELLO?! I told ya e truth by showing u wat VCD we were watching which was In Her Shoes. Wat was more pissing was tt the first station pretended it was not their fault n stayed on in the stupid room.

Next, ZZZ wanted to borrow Dead Poet out cause we told her it's damn good (It is!) then apparently tt crazy woman was very angry with us n kept harping on the fact tt we "bluff" her. ZZZ was complaining to her why she didn't chase the first group out since they were the ones making the most noise. Tt woman said the boy complaint about us (yar right.) n tt we were the noisiest when she went in. Excuse me... I believed u first scolded the first 2 stations yar? Just because Cameron Diaz scolded u doesn't mean it was our fault AND the boy scolded the first station so obviously he weren't complaining about us. Btw, she gave another excuse of our group being too big, hence we made alot of noise thus we were not allowed back inside. Details of conversation between 2 of them is unclear but basically should be what I've recounted.

Being the "CANNOT-SAY-DIE" us, we went to look for our beloved teacher to help us. We told her we wanted to watch Dead Poet's Society but we were chased out of the library. Being the nice her, she agreed to help us talk to the librarian. This time, ZZZ went with her. Apparently (details unclear), she told the librarians that we wanted to watch dead poet n could we use the room instead. Librarian got suspicious n asked is the movie really ok.

Our teacher: Yes, it's fine. It's a great movie!

XXX didn't believe her... lol (obviously) n said (lowering her tone) she saw a half-naked woman walking around in the movie. Our teacher got a shock n asked ZZZ were we watching porn or something. ZZZ panicked n explained that we were watching In Her Shoes. Our teacher had no idea wat that was so she explained that it was a chic-flick by cameron diaz. XXX got angry n said that we bluff her n etc etc n she wouldn't let us into the room. Our teacher helped us explain n stuff but in e end, we couldn't use the room. our teacher must be feeling damn paiseh n stuff, thinking that we must be some deprived gals who get together on a friday afternoon to watch porn. I feel so sorry that we have to trouble her n we could have gotten her into some trouble. ZZZ kept apologising to our teacher after tt n she was really nice about it, saying it's ok.

We got even more bored since we were officially ban from the library. This is not the end man. Then ZZZ realised that the stupid librarian confiscated the Dead Poet tt ZZZ has already borrowed so ZZZ had to go back in to get it back from the librarian. After some time, ZZZ n ZZZ went in to see wat was wrong. Then me n ZZZ went in. The irritating librarian refused to let ZZZ borrow the vcd out. WHAT IS THIS?!?! We paid school fees n tt place is a SCHOOL library n we're students of the prestigious WOW-WOW sch but we're not allowed to borrow the vcd out?!?! She said it's cause we lied to her or in her words "U bluff me... u bluff me... u bluff me." n if we want to borrow stuff, we have to talk to YYY the YYY librarian who is rumoured to be the ULTIMATE. She black-listed ZZZ (WTH) n got ZZZ damn angry. They argued n XXX kept insisting that she didn't black-list her. Then may I ask why on earth did she take down her name? To list her for the gd student award ah? Black-list ppl also dun wanna admit.

Then she said, "If u have done nothing wrong, u should have nothing to be afraid of." Fine. She also said tt she black-listed the girl who came with our teacher but she didn't ask for ZZZ's name so we were wondering who on earth did she black-list? Ooh... a mystery. I got piss off n asked the librarian why can't ZZZ borrow the vcd since she had already borrowed it in the first place. I think she recognised me as the girl who supposedly lied to her n started insisting the we bluff her. AGAIN. ZZZ got piss n retorted that we didn't n she replied with dunno wat cause I've already dragged ZZZ out to avoid further confrontations. Haiya, in the middle she kept threatening to bring the matter to our principal n we have to talk to YYY n watsoever.

So irritating! We didn't bluff her in e first place. I was guai n showed her the vcd tt we were watching which was In Her Shoes. FYI, it's rated PG. KNS. It's NOT PORN! I dun wanna be labelled as one of the girls who stayed back to watch porn. Dammit. Which hollywood chick-flick doesn't have a sex-scene. What kind of movies does tt XXX watch anyway? This is damn infuriating. Just cause she came in at the wrong time, she can accuse us of watching porn. Argh. BUT I do admit that it's wrong of us to bring in our own movie but argh....

After tt we were just piss but were also laughing our heads off over XXX being confused about what we were actually watching n how Diaz had scolded her. Cause we were supposed to go the Chinese Drama performance tt night, we had 2-3 hours left before we were supposed to go for dinner. Went the council room to find games to play, the place was closed due to to Table-Tennis finals. Went J8 MOS hoping to drink milk-shake, the machine broke down. SUAY LA!

Basically tt's the end of my memorable Friday.

Btw, I do have some qns about the stupid library system. Why can't we bring in our own vcds to watch? It's a school library! No one will have e guts to bring porn in to watch. If u meant to say that we can only bring in library materials then how come we can bring in our own textbook, storybooks or watever into the library to study/read?

We are not taking up space, we can't help it if the room is small n tiny n it's a excludable good. Btw, who on earth will want to watch movie alone? We are not loners.... n 2/3 ppl cannot watch a movie using a pair of pathetic headphones. Anyway, I'm saying the the cinefile or watever u call it is a BAD idea. The idea behind it is good, the way it's structured is BAD. BAD BAD BAD.

This is so irritating. Most libraries that I've gone to have terrible librarians. BAD SERVICE! esp those in schools. Only nice to parents, teachers, visitors. HYPOCRITES. Service in school is equally important as outside school alright n students are not considered as pariahs I believe. I feel like launching a complaint to the school using my parent's name but I won't do tt.

Boring Life.

2006-04-21T21:46:00.000+08:00

This is damn terrible. I dunno wat to blog about. My life is BORING.

Yes, I've officially dropped FM. Totally eliminated from the elites group but dun needa feel sorry for me. I know wat I'm doing n I'm feeling much better than I've been for the past few months =) If u do come n console me, I may just end up crying in front of u... lol

My class seems damn tired these days. Everyone's having pimple outbreaks on their faces. Eye bags n stuff are getting serious. Must take care ya esp Friend... u noe who u are

Watched Just Like Heaven in the sch library today. Nice! Really sweet though I can't exactly make out wat they are saying half e time cause I keep hearing the other movie tt's playing in e same room. Basically, 4 stations were playing 4 different movies simultaneously. MADNESS.

I've decided to catch a movie every friday after school in the school library =) Destress! Anyone can join me, guys, gals, gays, les, metrosexual... ya. As long as I know u... lol. Btw, it's not a waste of time cause after watching e movie today, I felt more obliged to study later tonight to make up for e lost hours. Yup. This is gd =)

Gonna go back to studying. I feel like me again! Woosh!

Everybody is special

2006-04-20T22:28:00.000+08:00

I wanna be special but I know I'm just an average s'pore girl.

From The Incredibles (Pixar Animation)......

Mom: Everyone is special

Dash: It's just a way of saying nobody's special

Fraud

2006-04-14T20:55:00.000+08:00

Got my PW result. Band 2. Yup. All tt hard work for a pathetic bloody hell band 2.

Wanna know how I feel? My ENTIRE group got a band 2 (I guess. I'll freak if any of my grp members got a band 1) Wat kind of a f**king situation is tt? Wat's e pt of putting in so much effort, going through the hard work n pain, irritation n frustration with one another even until e extent of hating everyone in e grp when I ended up with a band 2 or rather, the same as some others? MOE is fraud. O/A Levels are bullshit. This whole meritocracy thing is shit. The teachers said tt those who doesn't put in e effort will get wat they deserve. Oh really? Thanks so much. I am so damn piss. SERIOUSLY. All e time wasted on this PW shit. I'm so upset I dunno wat to say. This is SO unfair! Ppl around me aren't helping either. Words n stuff kept running through my head... ARGH.

PW is to learn to work in a grp n stuff right but they grade u individually. OK. So... why do I end up getting the same or worse than those slackers? I'm not going to say WATEVER cause this is something I really care about. This whole grading thing or watsoever is fraud. Might as well go back to individual stuff. I felt like I'm totally being used n all tt. I've put in my best n I didn't even make use of others like wat some other ppl think. This is so damn it.

"XXX is so poor thing to get a group like tt" Go to hell.

Read something in e newspaper today. Wanna know wat our current meritocracy n class system is breeding? SNOBS. I agree. Say watever u like about me but the whole ideal thing is just a fraud. Watever happened to values n virtues? Do u mean tt even if I'm a good person but I don't have abilities to contribute economically, I'm actually a burden to e society? Thanks

The worst of mankind is hypocrisy n I'm e best at it.

IQ, EQ n AQ

2006-04-13T22:48:00.000+08:00

IQ, EQ n AQ are keys to success. Which do I lack? I think all.... bleah.

Demoralized.

Official Opening of RJC campus at Bishan

2006-04-08T17:20:00.000+08:00

I saw the PM today!!!!! OMG. It's like how many times in ur entire life do u get to see e PM in person? Though we're a democratic country, the only times I see our PM are on tv. Yup.

btw, was the official sch's opening today. nothing much happened. I basically went around asking for donations in aid of the Bone marrow donor's programme n walking around the ORA funfair which doesn't consist of much. Wanted to buy the rugby bear to help them raise fund but it's damn ex. David said can gimme discount but I guess he's only kidding... bleah. Anyway did u know tt the chance of finding a suitable donor who's unrelated is 1/20 000 and only 1/10 sibling is suitable????? so I'm calling every one who's healthy and well to sign up to be a bone marrow donor. It's a huge commitment but u can save a life! It doesn't hurt too! Just a sore back after the op.

Today I said something stupid to my classmate. He asked am I going to donate my blood or something then I replied something like my blood is dirty. Siao. I'm weird. TOTALLY. WTH. Whatever. I feel so dumb.

Been thinking abt lotsa stuff these days. Going back to work now ... gonna be a long way to go before end of As.

Time of the Month

2006-04-07T16:03:00.000+08:00

Content below is not exactly suited for guys nor children. But! Can be considered as sexuality education (not exactly).

Being a woman is damn tough.

I'm in constant pain. Every month, I feel like going for a special op to extract a part of me. Feels damn tired every night. Didn't even have e energy to walk home frm sch just now. Wanted to just collapse at the junction. Pain Pain PAIN. Sometimes I don't even feel like coming out of e toilet. Just wanna stay in there e whole day. I need blood. I want a cold drink too! It's damn hot outside but I can't. Headache yesterday, cramps today. This is hellish. Even taking a blue slip needs serious consideration cause stupid classmates will remember how many blue slips u have taken.

At this stupid time of e month, ppl can attack u for all they want and u can't retaliate cause fatigue sets in. Totally week. Even going for PE makes u feel disgusted. Not just tt, I just wanna lie on my bed all day or just sit on e damn toilet bowl. Don't even wanna move.

Being a woman is argh. Monthly pain. Before tt gotta undergo PMS. Guys forever giving tt exasperated "argh! girls!" look. Woman wants a job, a good marriage. Then when get pregant, get pre-natal stress, post-natal depression, if ur stupid husband wants more kids, the cycle repeats. It's viscious. Even when having that for e first time, it's the girl tt suffers.

Kids give u trouble when they're babies. Upon growing up, u need to shower them with love n care even if they don't deserve it(I luv kids but now is not the time). ppl blame the mom if the kids turn out to be brats. Worry about family, boss bias against u cause thinks that u're constantly giving ur family the priority. On e other hand, ppl point their fingers at u, saying u're a BAD mom if u put ur career first. Then upon reaching age of 50, the actual pms sets in. Ppl despise u. WTH.

I'm TOTALLY incoherent. Whatever. U can't think properly when u're undergoing such torment. I wanna be a man. I don't know. Whatever. I wanna be a plant.

Guys/gals: U wouldn't understand wat I'm going through unless u have been through it urself. I hate e time of the month.

Go to hell

2006-03-29T18:21:00.000+08:00

I've nv thought I'll say this but ya. I'm totally fucked up. watever.

The world's fine. It's just me

SOS

2006-03-29T18:18:00.000+08:00

me: SOS.... SOS... SOS

(no reply)

me: SOS... SOS... SOS

(silence)

me: SOS... SOs... Sos... sos.................................

(End of Story)

Insanity

2006-03-27T20:17:00.000+08:00

My level of sanity is scaring me. Or rather, I've reached a new height of insanity

Shopping freak

2006-03-24T22:41:00.000+08:00

I went shopping with xx yesterday! Damn tiring but was fun! Apparently xx was damn rich and wanted to buy something from almost every shop. Being the encouraging me, of course I told her to buy an item from every shop that we stepped into cause she'll be damn happy. Of course she didn't la but she did spend quite alot yesterday. Rather surprising -.^

Bought a top for $48. Immediately regretted when I got home. Won't wear it often one lor and so bloody expensive. Yesterday was supposed to be feminine day so kept looking at feminine stuff. For me hor, yesterday was just an exception laaaa. How many times have u guys seen me wear heels man. Though I luv my current pair, IT HURTS! PAIN! TONG! IDAI! TIA-! Cannot go shopping in heels, will die. So I'm back to wearing my sneakers again... so comfortable =)Back to the top, xx said it's long term investment. YAR RIGHT. Make up I understand, a top? ARGH. I got song2 yong3!!! OH NO!!!Dammit. Watever. And I can't claim frm my mom cause I don't dare. Yar. K la... officially broke again and I can't blame anyone but myself (Maybe xx too) I ate into my nxt month's allowance too cause I bought some other stuff today.

I feel so sad I wanna cry. Get me a rich guy. Or rich friend. Gone are the days of crystal jade or canteen jap food. Hello $1.10 canteen lunch.

Pain!

2006-03-24T22:24:00.000+08:00

Went for hair cut at Thomson Plaza today. OUCH man! The hairdresser ah... kept pulling my hair like nobody's business. The scissors he used must be blunt lor or else why on earth was it so damn bloody f-cking painful. Told him to be gentle... replied with "orh" then still continue. Stupid guy mumbles too. Was asking me wat kinda hairstyle I prefer and I had to ask him to repeat 3 times before I caught wat he was saying.

Told him I want to layer the back but he gave me the long layer kind. WTH. I'm cutting my hair short, if u give me the long layer, no one can tell it's layered. stupid. And now my hair is damn flat. FLAT leh. OMG. I have a flat head.... argh... plus he didn't give me a proper parting. Next time I shall get a female to help me cut. At least girls are more gentle and have better shen3 mei3 guan1. My beautiful hair is gone. YES. GONE. Though it was messy, at least i didn't have a flat head then.

However, it was my fault too to give him the freedom to cut watever style he thinks is suitable for me. I'm sucha asshole. argh. Never going back there again. Anyone got nice hairdresser to recommend?

How am I going to face the world? Sigh... BAD LUCK. My head is still aching from the haircut. Hope he gets migrain tonight too. HMPH

My D.O.B

2006-03-22T21:25:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday to me! and belated to michelle!

Yup. CTs FINALLY over. had physics today. wat a way to spend my birthday. It was TRICKY! Will fail. And I think I will fail all my subs la. sigh. However, shan't think about it for now.

My birthday was spent in the most most normal way. Went sch, mug, dinner with class, END. yup. But i rented 40-yr-old virgin! HAHA. I officially can watch M18 shows. And can go learn to drive! and go clubbing! and (frm wenloong) go to jail -.-" Yes. tt's how my classmates wished me happy birthday.

Thanks to those who sent me birthday wishes. And gd luck to those whose exams have not ended. Gonna watch lotsa dvds/vcds now... hehe!

How weird are YOU?

2006-03-11T21:37:00.000+08:00

You Are 30% Weird

Not enough to scare other people...
But sometimes you scare yourself.

How Weird Are You?

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion:

You have medium extroversion.
You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.
Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.
But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time."

Conscientiousness:

You have medium conscientiousness.
You're generally good at balancing work and play.
When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done.
But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it.

Agreeableness:

You have medium agreeableness.
You're generally a friendly and trusting person.
But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism.
You get along well with others, as long as they play fair.

Neuroticism:

You have high neuroticism.
It's easy for you to feel shaken, worried, or depressed.
You often worry, and your worries prevent you from living life fully.
You tend to be emotionally reactive and moody. Your either flying very high or feeling very low.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is medium.
You are generally broad minded when it come to new things.
But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it.
You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

The Five Factor Personality Test

You Are 30% Evil

A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well.
In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil.

How Evil Are You?

My Perfect Loverrrr

2006-03-11T20:07:00.000+08:00

Was bored so was surfing blogs. Realised tt I'm tagged by Lian. Guess half of my friends are like guessing wat kinda guys I go for since I dun exactly go crazy over guys like them... (except for a certain few ^_^) Yupyup... here's ur answer.

Rules: Tagged person must come up with 8 points about their perfect lurver. must include the sex of ur lurver. (hahah!)

sex: Male (I'm not les with man, cathy or yiyou alright... I'm 100% straight!!!)

1. Mature but still has that child in him. I dun wanna go out with a child but neither do I want an old man. Maturity means I can at least talk to him about serious stuff and gets decent opinions. I'll like someone whom I think that I can rely on psychologically rather than physically.

2. Good sense of humour. Preferable witty as well. Can u imagine going out with someone who has a TERRIBLE sense of humour. It's such a horrid scene that I don't even wanna imagine it.

3. Someone whom I can talk to about everything under the sun and not feel embarrassed when I ended up saying something stupid. At least he gotta be someone whom I feel that can let my guard down. (That is like near impossible but this is all about the perfect lover who doesn't exist anyway)

4. Smart. Not academically smart but just quick-thinking.

5. Sensitivity is a quality that is damn important and terribly lacking in guys these days. Gotta be sensitive enough to know what is to be avoided and wat should be brought up. Overly sensitive is a BIG no-no. I dun need a mother hen fussing over me annd definitely not a cry-baby who gets upset over my sarcastic remarks.

6. Musically inclined. Preferably gd at sports too =) I'm totally attracted to guys who can play musical instruments WELL. Have a soft spot for them. I started to like Jay Chou partly cause he looks damn suave playing the piano. I cannot withstand the deadly attraction... Though I'm not exactly attracted to guys in guitar =X They're nice but yar.

7. Caring towards animals and children. I love animals. Children well... most of them except the whiny, bratty ones. It shows the caring side of him.Everyone needs a tender, loving lover yar. If he bullys animals and children, he gotta be some bastard. Then again, I do bully children once in a while but tt's cause I love to play with them k. Oh yar, MUST love dogs =)

8. Gotta be someone who can puts his ego aside and admits that there are people who are better. I.e. Modest. Been around too many egoistic guys. DISGUSTED. Modesty is a virtue. Need to say more?

I shall add more qualities to make it a perfect 10 (hahah... damn greedy)

8.5 (Linked to pt 8). Not someone who will try to impose his ideas on me. I have my own opinions dude. If u want me to agree with ya, u gotta CONVINCE me. On the other hand, I dun want someone who agrees with me on everything. BORING.

9. Gotta agree with Lian on this. Filial. A sign of dedication to the people he loves =)

10. Most importantly, someone whom I can treat and treat me as an equal. Someone whom I'll be able to love whole-heartedly. He gotta loves me for who I am but will point out my flaws to me in a sensitive manner and vice versa. Haiya, I just want someone that who loves me and someone who enables me to love with trust and sincerity.

My perfect lover, where are you? I guess I'll find him in my dreams only =X These are just qualities of the perfect lover anyway. Even if I do find someone with all these qualities, he may not be someone I'll like and I may just end up with someone who has none of them (hope not)

Read this somewhere long ago - My lover has gotta be my best friend as well. Agree! Love is something that comes from within and it's the feeling u get when u hang out with that someone.

People I'm tagging:
1) Mandy
2) xx
3) Shao

Happy doing ppl! I'm particularly interested in Shao's perfect lover =)

Btw, no MCPs (Obvious isn't it)

Bitch

2006-03-08T22:47:00.000+08:00

Went for dinner @ cafe cartel after gp common test (which sucks big time. I'm screwed AGAIN) Was talking about bitching. Like how bitching about other people is damn mean and how the person involved would feel.

I admit la. I bitch. Like all e time. I always thought that if I admit to my bitchiness, it's not much of a big deal. However, the more I thought of it, the more terrible it seems. It's like I'm actually proud of the fact that I bitch about people. How gross. I'm in this total state of dilemma of deciding whether to bitch or not. I'm not some saint that can accept people's flaw but I dun think I have e courage to say it straight into people's face what I'm unhappy about. I can't keep all those stuff within me but then again, it's WRONG to bitch about people. ArgH. I need to undergo radical change. Maybe I need to sort out my thinking first. Shall use the hol n common test period to sort stuff out. Needa avoid people. Oh. This is so insane.

Happy stuff... I'm totally inspired to work harder for my gp =) cause he remembers my name. I'm over the clouds (did i use it correctly? I remember it's over something something tt's in e sky or is it over the moon? stars?) !! happy!!! I can't sleep tonight. I'm totally smitten...... lalalalala...

I just read the 4th bk of NANA. It's really good!! Those who can read manga, go grab it. (Gals esp) It's damn good. I'm addicted. Can't wait for the next book. Will catch the movie if it ever comes out on VCD/DVD. DEFINITELY.

P.S: I'm trying to make myself not so apathetic but at the same time, I'm having trouble coping with too much emotions. Insanity is setting in.

Random entry. Happy reading!

p.p.s: I don't not like J1s. I just can't bring myself to accept them. Heard even more terrible stuff about what they did during O2. geez

Atrocity of Students from the TOP jc

2006-03-03T22:30:00.000+08:00

Today (Friday), between 10 and 11 during my GP lesson, 2 J1 boys (still wearing RI uniform) came into B22 to borrow an OHP from their kind J2 seniors (my class la).

Boy 1: Excuse me, may we borrow ur OHP?

Teacher: Sure sure.

My Classmate, A: The OHP is spoilt.

Boy 2: But you have 2 wat!

Classmate B: They're both spoilt.

Teacher: They're BOTH spoilt?!

Classmate A (To boy boys): You can try.

Boy 1 went to fumble with the OHP.

Teacher: You can try if you want. (weird laughter frm her)

Boy boys: Never mind la, never mind la (waving hands in e air)

The above conversation is not a true reflection of what was actually said but the idea is there. However, the last statement was EXACTLY what they said (without a word less)

OMG la. What kinda attitude is that? FREAKS. Lack of respect TOTALLY. It's like there's actually a teacher in the classroom in case they didn't see her. Assholes. If u wanna borrow stuff from us, u gotta have the right attitude man. Dun be a son of a bitch. Nah. I shan't scold ur mom. U boys (not guys/men) are just pains in e ass.

I told u guys tt this yr J1s are such freaks. No respect, rowdy, mean, full of themselves, immature, etc. Oh man, I was rather tempted to shoot them with air pistols from where I was sitting. These guys gotta go learn some manners seriously. I don't really care if they're smart or whatever. Please live up to ur school's motto pls - Hope for a better future. Please be the hope and not make us pray to hope for a better future. Stupid children.

Btw, when my classmate told them e OHPs are spoilt, i highly suspected that one of them rolled his eyes. I hope he gets sore eyes from rolling them too much. Hmph. Atrocious behaviour la!!!!! I witnessed this personally! So my conclusion is that they're currently thorns in my flesh. (Their looks don't make up for it either)

Argh. I think they uses classroom B21 at their period of time. Shall go find out what class is it. Stupid J1s. The J1s frm guitar are terrible too. Noisy like hell. Can't stop showing off with their guitar skills. I noe they're damn pro but shut the hell up when the conductor's talking. The lack of respect for their snrs is something that I can't be bothered with already. One day I may just grab the guitar of the small guy (yar, the noisy one from guitar 2) and smash it over his head. Yup yup. I'm violent so sue me -.-

Digress abit. My GP common test is this coming WED!!! GOSH GOSH GOSH!!! I'm so going to die!!! In addition, I still have school that morning. The school is freak. Sometimes I wish I have a wider range of vocab so that I can scold everything around me with more sophisticated words but currently, I'll just curse with these - XXXXXXXXXXXX

To conclude today's entry. J1s have a long way to go before they can step into the society and remain unharm. In addition, I'm gonna DIE for my common test. But I really really REALLY wanna pass physics (cause Mr Lee has been rather nice to me)

In the mood............ to blog

2006-03-02T22:41:00.000+08:00

Though I'm in e blogging mood, I forgot wat I wanna blog about. I think it was supposed to be something along the lines of complicated people or rather people being complicated. Or was it finding out more about myself? I'm having short term memory these days. It's like I'm not putting in effort to go remember stuff. OMG OMG OMG. I'm getting senile!!!!! Anyway, back to serious business.

We are all complicated people. I'm rather sick of guessing what others are thinking. We are so fickle! One second this, one second that. Then again, I enjoy observing people and listening out to wat others are say (eavesdropping ^^). Sometimes when we break things down, everything looks easy. However, when we go beyond the surface, we're complicated once again. Feelings beyond happiness, sorrow, anger. Feelings that words cannot describe (maybe due to my poor language).

These days as I think back about how e class has progressed and how ppl have changed (including me, though I often deny it), I start to realise that everyone seems to have a different side in them. (To 2S02B, I'm WATCHING u guys) Better or worse, I wouldn't judge so soon but things have gone beyond my deduction. Shall continue to observe situations before making any conclusion. Some of them are just more than wat they appear to be. Things aren't tt simple anymore yar.

Take ME for example. I'll admit it.

There's evil Yu Xin in me. The one that thinks of all the mean, crazy stuff that I'll do to people whom I deem as evil/jian.

There's also the sarcastic Yu Xin who appears 95% of the time. I admire her the most. She makes my life most interesting (I sound weird. It's like sarcastic Yu Xin aren't me but she is. I'm not making sense) Without tt part in me, my life will be damn boring, it's something tt distinguishes me from my peers =) Though negatively but so far, it's bringing me somewhere. At least I'm sensitive enough to know my limits (most of e time)

Demure Yu Xin is, which I strongly believe, hidden somewhere in me, just tt it's in e centre of a damn complicated maze. I'm 100% sure (confirm, chop chop!) tt I'll find it one day though!

The one I love e most is the quiet side of me. Being able to sit down to read a good book, to think through stuff or even just to stone is considered a luxury to me. Sometimes I feel intelligent when I'm just sitting quietly by myself and think about everyday stuff (stop puking....) It's like I'm a philosophical, sophisticated n mature person. (Ok, puke if u want) I'm glad I'm not hyperactive. Yar, just wanna illustrate e fact that there's many sides to a person. Like a die (I'm learning stats now... can't help it if i'm using a die) 6 different faces, one object. That's human nature =) Forgot to say this, though I'm quiet at times, I can be LOUD too. Like VERY.

Too cheem already. Feel like slping.... continue another day.....

Quote of the day

2006-03-01T20:21:00.000+08:00

Here's wat I've learnt in my one year in RJ.

Ren2 Xin1 Nan2 Ce4

Yup. Congrats to those who have done well in As.

Some ppl are just DAMN jian4. Bitch. Bastard.

BAD BAD DAY

2006-02-17T22:43:00.000+08:00

Started off the day pretty well. Gave away e v day presents tt i owed. Gave broccoli to David cause he said he likes cauliflower though I personally thinks that broccoli is nicer. Anyway, gave fruits/veg to the gals and didn't get anything for the guys cause had no idea wat to buy. And they ate lots of chocs from me already anyway.

Then stoned during lectures. Felt tired the whole day cause slept late the day before. argh... I'm not used to sleeping after 1 anymore. Basically stoned the curriculum hours away. Met val after sch. Went shopping at J8. Went library to mug afterwards while she went for some ODAC meeting. Then meet up again for talentime which was basically not bad. Mr. Siva rox! I wanna change PE teacher!!! kidding. I like him only when he sings but gotta admit, he's cute... lol. After that went for movie under the stars at RJ's parade square. 50 First Dates. Another romantic comedy. Rather cute and stuff but abrupt ending. Like totally HUH?! yup. It was supposed to be a hot date with her cause I missed her so much -puke- but I was too tired and she could be too bored. Hot date with doritos? Nah... and it would have been more fun if there were MORE ppl. Should have gotten the class to go. Geez

Got my dad to fetch me home from sch after the movie. He very irritating la. The first thing he said to me was that I looked as though I didn't have any friend cause everyone seems to be in groups but I'm waiting alone. Yar. Reality hits again.... to think I thought my day was alright. I hate to be reminded that I lack friends. Esp in RJ. I can't help it. RJ ppl are WEIRD. LIKE DAMN OUT OF MY LEAGUE. Just get out. Piss.

Good Day

2006-02-15T12:55:00.000+08:00

Happy Total Defence Day! Happy belated Valentine's Day! To those who gave me presents, thanx alot!! It's really nice of u guys to think of me =) Though I'm awfully sorry that ur presents aren't ready! Been busy. Terribly frustrated these days and I have no idea why. I think e stress is getting on me and there's tons of work to do. Damn IT.

I'm sick. Running nose, cough, sore throat. Just lack the fever. Yup... feeling terrible for the whole of yesterday. Like I'm gonna faint anytime. MC today but still lots of work to do. To those who are speculating, YES. I'm VERY sick of school. Like totally immune to going to sch. Couldn't be bothered.

Wkend was slack. Watching Korean show - "My name is Sam Soon". Nice! Guy damn cute! ultra cute!

V day was boring. Like nothing exciting going on. Just giving and receiving. Nothing special. No one confess to anyone. No drama, etc. SIAN DIAO. Went home to sleep immediately after sch. I feel pathetic... argh... being sick drives me nuts.

Anyway, just a lousy but simple update. I miss my friends.

P.S: Happy birthday to Zhou Yue!!

Feminism

2006-02-02T21:06:00.000+08:00

I'm a feminist. Not the extreme kind but dun ever try to do the MCP thing on me. U'll DIE.

Sometimes my independence, my mouth, my lack of tolerance, my temper and my thoughts scare me. However, I love myself.

Been facing cockiness, insensitivity and the great importance of males in society as well as individualism alot lately. Getting on my nerves. Just leave me alone. Oh ya, I realised playing politics is my forte.

And my teacher is so conservative, bias and results oriented that I so wanna storm out of her class and tell her to go back to sec sch to teach.

P.S: Was sitting at KFC today, heard 2 guys scolding vulgarities consisting female terms, (eg bitch, mother-blahblah, etc) Got so angry, I muttered "go f*** yourself" Apparently, they shut up. I luv myself even more now =)

P.P.S: Love is SOOOO in e air for 2S02B now (although there are desperados).

Welcome, beloved bengs

2006-02-01T18:39:00.000+08:00

RJC has welcomed a new batch of chao ah bengs.... 3/4 frm a particular CCA.... yup. This yr's J1s are brats cum terror! not all definitely but MOST. List of things I heard and saw:

1) Grp of guys played with sex toys and got caught. (dun even noe how to be discreet)

2) They call OGL "bitch" (no respect... kns)

3) They "threaten" PRCs. (I'm so gonna threaten them by telling their teacher)

4) Rumours have it that they fought with their seniors. (WOAH. So "heroic")

5) They behave as though they own the school. (I dun even care if u're LKY's grandson, and I noe u're NOT)

6) They stared at me when I walked in MY homeroom when it's time for MY lesson. (Assholes. Shall put thumbtacks on those seats next time)

7) They walk in before we even step out of OUR homeroom for the next lesson. (RESPECT for snrs la, nv heard of it b4 is it?)

Lucky lucky 7. I dun like them. Period.

Memoirs of A Geisha was not bad. Though the book's MUCH better! And someone who was next to me behaved as though she's watchin a horror movie =X

Book Recommendation

2006-01-31T20:07:00.000+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year!

It's been a month since I last updated. Been hardworking... doing my tutorials and stuff and for ONCE, I'm on par with the teachers that is (I'll nv be able to catch up with my peers... they're CRAZY). Anyway, spent my long wkend doing fulfilling stuff. Nope, I didn't mug. I basically got addicted to reading once again and was just munching goodies, getting ang baos and reading. I luv this slack life... kinda miss it after dec hol. I didn't watch tv though =) (An achievement)

Anyway, I'm not tt worried abt the amt of work tt's piling up at the moment. I'm still indulging myself within novels. Just finished "My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult. It's a rather inspirational book tt dealt with the issue of making choices, ethic and moral stuff. No romance, just family luv, one's right and giving up one for the other. Highly recommended by me! I bought mine at kinokuniya at $17++ with 20% discount.

Ok... the book is basically about this girl who was conceived to save her sister who was diagnosed with leukaemia at the age of 3, i.e she is sort of like genetically modified to be a perfect match of her a sister's genes. Then when her mom "asked" her to donate a kidney to her sister, she decided to sue her parents for the rights to her own body. Yar lar, excuse my lousy summary but u guys should really just go read the book. It's GOOD regardless of my lousy summary with a good twist at the end. I got teary... lol

School's blah blah the same. gonna watch Memoirs of Geisha tmr with my class as part of learning journey =) But I'm so gonna expect something to crop up...

Gonna get started on my tutorials.... argh

Have a great new year!!

P.S: xx, man n shao, come my house when free k?! The goodies are finishing (surprise surprise!)
To others, if u wanna come, do give prior notice =)

(Nxt up: Ah Bengs @ RJC... so "excitingggggg")

Embracing 2006

2005-12-31T14:55:00.000+08:00

It's the last day of yr 2005 which was actually a rather terrible yr for me. What have I been doing? Living in self-pity. How gross! Ok la but there were fun moments where I really enjoyed myself especially my first 3 months in AJ, yup. I enjoyed PE to a certain extent.

I've also basically wasted my 2 months worth of hol. Not actually studying n doing hw BUT I had plenty of rest =) And I met up with friends. Even yiyou la. And it was sorta a last minute decision cause our schedules always seemed to clash. LOL. Had fun. Then I also did CIP. Oh man, the Metro CIP was nightmarish. I practically cursed throughout the whole 4 1/2 hours when I was there. Thank gdness got xx with me. But the sunday when I was doing it again was alright. Ppl seemed more willing to donate. I guess the free gift has its attraction but frankly speaking, I think the ducky looks yucky. (it rhymes ^.-) Well, not sure if the 9 hours were worth it but at least I get $10 =) I'm easily satisfied. To be honest, I did it partly for the pay... LOL which was supposed to be our dinner money but haiya, suibian la.

Went to chalet with 0805. It was the only gathering I went... hehe... e pri sch one got cancelled. I pangseh Liyi for the sec 4 one cause I found it too weird since the ppl I'm close to weren't going. I felt so bad for pangseh-ing her lor... Sorry! Chalet was fun to a large extent. Didn't eat much cause the marshmallow someone gave me made me felt sick.

Spent xmas eve with the usual gang. Had slpover at shao's. FUN! Although the UNO stacko was too small la! Had to use my "weapon" (a fork) so that it wun collapse. Walked around Orchard, went Crystal Jade (Well.... NICE!) Rotted in the afternoon... but it's nice to rot with friends =) And then shao, xx n me went to watch Narnia!!!! It was fantasic! No joke, I luv it! The effects and everything. Peter's cute. See la mandy! Dun want watch =P Missed out on gd show. And Aslan looked damn realistic... luv it!

Went to watch Wallace & Gromit with yy at lido. Got first row seats (wow.... -.-) The woman at the ticket office kept reminding us the show starts at 6.35... I was like "I KNOW! Haiyo!" The plot was quite interesting la... I'm not a big fan of the clay figures but I like Gromit. Smart dog! Oh ya, she bought me the Chip & Dale plush toys! Thanks alot!!! And after 1 yr of not seeing yy, she has got more nu3 ren2 wei4 now but I didn't want to tell her then cause her ego's a little too big. Lol but I agree with her bro that if she goes out with her bf, ppl might think they're gay... lol.

Despite missing out on good movies like Pride & Prejudice, at least I managed to catch Narnia =)
Here's a list of movies I've watched in the theatres this yr (I can't remember some tt I've watched at the beginning of the yr but this is enough lor, I think it's the most I've watched in a yr)

1) Constantine
2) Hide & Seek
3) Howl's Moving Castle
4) Lemony Snicket: A Series of Unfortunate Events
5) Hitch
6) Robots
7) The Interpreter
8) Initial D
9) Mr. & Mrs. Smith
10) Batman Begins
11) Be With You
12) Bewitched
13) The Myth
14) Madagascar
15) Harry Potter And The Goblet of Fire
16) The Exorcism of Emily Rose
17) Chicken Little
18) The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, The Wardrobe
19) Wallace & Gromit

P.S: But I've watched LOADS of VCDs/DVDs... hehe

Guess that's about it. Oh ya, I've already gotten my wallet, my harry potter, chip & dale and my E Mo Zai Shen Bian. Yup, I just desperately need a pencil case n someone to gimme free tuition ^.^

That's it for the yr 2005. See u guys next yr! Happy New Year! Oh ya, to those that I didn't send a xmas card to, sorry abt tt, I'm broke. So wait for nxt yr! Dun worry, I didn't forget u guys.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it SNOW!

2005-12-10T19:39:00.000+08:00

Christmas is approaching! Though I'm not Christian, I like the xmas season... To those who received my card, do send one back alright =) Anyway, since it's the season of giving, shall have a wishlist here so that u guys can experience the joy of giving and I noe some of u guys are wondering wat to get me for xmas... hahaha... anyway,

Merry Christms and Happy New Year!

1) Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince. (I could be the only one among my peers who HAVE NOT read it, nevertheless owns it. And it's damn expensive still... so anyone wanna buy it for me? I prefer the children's version. Thanks)

2) "E Mo Zai Shen Bian" VCD. (I'm dying to watch it... )

3) Pencil case. (Something flat, not the round round kind and NOT Billabong, Mambo or one of those)

4) Wallet. (Damn impt. Cause 2 of my friends actually commented that my current wallet is "auntie". Oh watever. Anyway, I've set my eyes on 3 different ones. 2 from "The Wallet Shop, the ones with the butterfly print frm Ozozo http://www.thewalletshop.com/wallets/ozozosac.html... n I like the ones with zip coin compartment ^_^)

5) An iMac notebook (Hahaha... getting greedy)

6) Just a treat at Crystal Jade. (I miss the Xiao Long Bao)

7) A HUGE plastic storage box so that I can keep my comics.

8) A bookshelf would be rather desirable

9) Shuttlecocks. (One tube yar?)

10) A treat to a movie marathon like Narnia, Wallace & Gromit, Prime and maybe Perhaps Love.

11) Free tuition for Physics/ Maths [including F Maths]/ Econs (Desperately needed. If u'll be able to help me... I'll be eternally grateful)

12) Flatscreen TV for my living room. (Our tv is almost as old as me...)

13) Chip & Dale soft toy frm Action City (So cuteeeeeeee!!)

14) If u're unable to get me any of the above, just send me a nice card will do to remind me that u're still my friend... hehe

Anyway, MayDay is having their concert NOW. And here I am sitting infront of my bro's comp updating my pathetic blog... Sigh. I could be screaming away hysterically... I could be singing Jue Jiang with them... I could be enjoying myself now LOR.

Looking forward to chalet with 0805 BUT no one has given me the exact details la...

Blah

2005-12-03T11:13:00.000+08:00

Decided to delete previous post. not very nice.

Shao is Kind!

2005-11-26T22:39:00.001+08:00

This will go down in history man. Shao a.k.a sz has treated me to dinner for the very first time!! pizza AND pasta! So kind la (actually she wanted me to blog this down) Went for dinner after watching A Twist of Fate @ the Esplanade. It was good but not tremendous. The twist was really good though. Rather surprising. Well, had dinner at Raffles City. The pizza place thingy... forgot the name. Anyway, the pizza's quite nice. Had "chef recommendation" but I dun like olive. Also had Carbonara Linguini. It's delicious. Not too cheesy n u wun get sick of it. Maybe cause I only had half a plate.

Back to shao treating me. I think it was because I look damn pitiful since I'm broke n stuff so she actually decided to treat me. So nice of her!!!! But maybe it's cause she's so sui bian... lol. kidding la. First time after knowing her for so long though. so stingy... tsk tsk. Must treat me more leh! Hao ren will have hao bao one. so nxt time treat me to crystal jade k *grinz*

Damn tired. Shall go slp. Continue nxt time.

Movies

2005-11-23T22:13:00.000+08:00

I'm definitely blogging for the sake of blogging not that I really wanna blog abt something.

A month of hol has gone by and one more to go. Sian ah! Didn't finish anything that I actually wanted to complete. Life is not meaningless though, learning lots frm bks n movies.

Just rented "Charlie n the Choc Fac" DVD yesterday. It's nice! Seriously, I feel like a child again, excited over the oompa loompas, I luv Willy Wonka! He's a magician!! Ok, I really enjoyed the show. All kids should watch it, so should adults. Basically everyone. Maybe the book's better. Not sure but the story's GREAT! (Sorry shao, didn't wait for u)

After watching the show, I was reminded how much I really luv reading last time. I basically read almost all of Roald Dahl's books (Not the latest ones though). I think "Matilda" was my fav. I liked "The Witches" n "BFG".... damn nice la... filled with so much imagination, so fantasy-ish, it's like modern fairytale! And it's not as sad as though Hans Christian Anderson ones.

Watched Harry Potter with shao last sat. Not bad seriously. Though reading the bk will be much more exciting but I seriously think that as a movie, it's really not as terrible as some put it. It's entertaining enough but it's rather dark and Lord V looks fake. BUT. it's not bad. I wanna watch Exorcism n Just like Heaven. As well as Narnia & Chicken Little! Ppl, call me la!

Oh ya, I watched Notting Hill again on VCD yesterday. Romantic la. I think rather cold these days n xmas' approaching. In a romantic mood! Not luvey dovey mood but romantic yar. Nice! Recommendation for people who can appreciate romance. Last time I watched it was very along ago at xx house but didn't leave a deep impression. This time, I realised it's a good show. I like Julia Roberts. It's soothing to watch her acting. Calm n peaceful. I think it's the show. Well, Hugh Grant has a rather erm... nice accent? I'm used to the American's but I think British one is rather well... sexy? Not those pseudo ones pls.

My life is so common. Boring but I'm just a simple commoner. YEAH.

Special Entry

2005-11-14T18:51:00.000+08:00

To read the following blog entry, please change ur encoding to.... "unicode" If u still can't read, so what? I couldn't be bothered.

大家好!我现在人在少芝家. 真好玩!第一次用中文写blog. Anyway, 我只想告诉大家我今天碰到一个让我很想痛扁一顿的人.他真是他妈的没礼貌.原本我因为从学校到Bugis to meet 少芝就已经很累了,所以想在食阁歇一会儿 (反正都要在那里吃饭). Just when I was walking towards an empty table (I've already given on typing using chinese), I heard a very aggressive but soft "excuse me" so being the courteous me, I'll naturally move aside for her. BUTTTTTTTTTTT to my UTMOST HORROR, she snatched that table and acted as though nothing happened.

他妈的!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate people who are kiasu n rude n everything. I hate everyone. F.

Marathon

2005-11-11T20:23:00.000+08:00

Been some time since I last blogged. Must try to blog more often these days. I'm like procrastinating EVERYTHING which is bad. Anyway, been reading. Just finished "Just Friends" by Robyn Sisman. It's a GOOD book. Recommended by xx leh... *surprise surprise* It's love story. Not exactly lovey dovey love but I do think it's romantic =) First time in my 17 yrs of living, I found something tt's utterly romantic so must go read. Yar... reading love stories aren't exactly my cup of tea though I do enjoy those bubblegummy chinese bks of internet love stories. Yar la. Just started on "Be the wing" It's by a Korean author, something like those ji2 mi3 bks. It's nice... quite philosophical leh. I feel like a bookworm and I think I will make a trip down to the library soon.

Just read something rather meaningful. It says that life's like a marathon (yes yes... it's one of those life's like a blah blah blah) Sounds true. It's tough. It's long. It's filled with obstacles but most importantly u need the perserverance to complete it and when u do, u feel good. At the same time, u meet different people on the way. Some that are fast and u try to catch up with them. And some that are slow and may need ur support to continue on. U're in the race with ur friends. U cheer each other on and u pull them along when they're out of breath and they do the same to u. There will be times when u wanna give up but u noe if u continue one more step, u're one step nearer to e finishing line. To complete the marathon, u're challenging no one but urself. So actually in life, u depend on no one but urself. ur best friend is urself and ur greatest enemy is also u. Ur friends n family cheer u on, but they themselves have a marathon to complete as well.

Sounds nice. I think my self-esteem is like damn low so I gotta read these kinda stuff to cheer myself on. Ok... it's the end of Yu Xin's philosophy lecture.

Announcement of the year: PW is O-V-E-R!!! Ok, except my I&R isn't complete. But whatever. Will leave it till tmr. I'm procrastinating AGAIN. When I look back, PW is definitely filled with more frustrations than joy but it's the frustration that keeps me going cause I told myself "It will be over... It will be over... It will be overrrr..." Except that towards the end I totally slacked off cause haiya... going to end soon anyway. My OP was well... not as good as I hoped it would be but it's alright. My slackest member was like damn pro during the presentation but it's ok. He was pro during dry run anyway. And I actually appreciate that. He makes me stress but he also make me wanna perform better. Ya. Xie la! Though I noe he won't read this.

My class is gonna have class outing AGAIN. I stress AGAIN on monday. Either movie or sentosa. I dun mind both but it all depends. Like I wanna watch Just like Heaven but apparently my supposedly buddies abandoned me. BUT it's ok. Back to e class outing thingy. I dun mind movie but if it's not wat I'm interested in then maybe I can wait till the movie's over. I dun mind sentosa but dun make me go tan. I dun mind the sun but purposely lie there to tan is a big NO-NO. Beach volleyball sounds nice but I can't play like a pro. Going sightseeing is ok but I dun have e cash. So... maybe I'll just stay at home... Haha... anti-social. As usual. Can't someone just organise a nice bbq or something. Class outing at library sounds cool! I remember someone wanted to have tt.

And I seriously need to start mugging hard so I guess I'll just lock myself at home for the rest of the hol. I'm broke anyway. Either tt or I'll go to the library everyday to mug. Like seriously get down to mugging. I sound diligent, as though I'm mugging all the time but actually no. I only started a little and I stop. Just like tt. I'm a pig. Shoot me.

I luv u, u luv me, we are happy family!

2005-11-02T14:37:00.000+08:00

It's the hol! And the nice side of me has come out again. The optimistic, happy, cheery, nice (but still sarcastic) and lovely yuxin is out again!! It's nice to see the sky so blue, the sun still shining and the grass so green... Hahah... I feel gross.

Listening to Stefanie Sun's First Day. I feel genki~~ U noe... I miss school. SURPRISE!!! Actually I realised school isn't tt bad. Ok... maybe the lessons were bad but overall, it's rather nice. I like it when it's slack and there's people around me. Ok, I dun really dislike my class that much. They're a bunch of nice people, just tt I kept poking at their flaws. Heheh... I'm bad. I think I sorta wasted my time moaning n groaning but now I feel alive again. BUT. Dun get near me nxt year, I can't deal with stress very well so come at ur own risk.

Last day of sch was well spent. Went naval base for learning journey. DAMN COOL! Though there's no cute navy boy but the fleets and stuff are like superb! I really enjoy myself. I luv the sea! And the sky! But the trip to n fro were like dead tiring. It's like as though someone has sucked my soul out and I was just lying on the chair like a corpse. Ok, there was a few high moment but it came n went faster than the speed of light -.- If there's learning journey again next yr, maybe can go some air base yar. Quite cool!

Was supposed to go ZH's house yesterday with the class but went out with xx instead cause super long nv go out already. SHOPPING! Went bugis village. Avoided looking at clothes cause money was supposed to be spent on a bag n wallet but in the end I bought none of those. Spent $50 u noe. $36 on books at kino... Yar, I'm an intellectual kid. And I've decided to not go out anymore during the hol cause needa mug for physics. But fri got steamboat with the class! Dunno whether can make it in time after my CIP. Oh and sz met us half an hr after I met up with xx cause xx said sz misses ME too much... LOL. So decided to call her out too~ She ah, keep spending la. Nv knew she got so much cash to spare. Wanted to have spontaneous stayover but in the end, everyone was too tired n lazy n I was having a splitting headache. My mom said it was supposed to a sign to tell me to GO HOME. But I basically ignored it until I was on the verge of fainting so got my beloved kind dad to fetch me home frm Bugis. Lalalala. I'm a spoiled child

Nxt fri is the oral presentation and I'm so not prepared. Haven't been practising and I bet lehui is practising like mad at home. During the dry run, mrs lim said I was monotonous. Sigh... Must try super hard to exaggerate and for QnA, I didn't really elaborate much. Ended up talking crap and I felt like a fool la... Sian... why can't I just take things more seriously. And I just remembered I haven't do my I&R. Well done man. But who cares. Shall leave till maybe the wkends.

I wanna go overseas! But no one's sponsoring and no one wanna go with me. So I wanna venture out of the main island! Sentosa anyone? Pulau Ubin? Sister Island? St' John? How about someone just bring me somewhere other than Orchard, Bugis, Toa Payoh, Bishan? But dun make me go all e way to pasir ris or east coast or jurong island. I'll die by the time I reach there. I think I shall continue indulging myself in VCDs n ice creams n cookies n maths n physics n econs. Goodbye... It's time to mug again!

(Anyone keen to mug with me during hol, pls gimme a call. If u dun have my no, tt means we aren't close enough to mug together =P)

Turning into Ice

2005-10-14T21:38:00.000+08:00

Been thinking alot lately. Realised dun really have much friends... wondering does that matter? Maybe it doesn't. I may be left with only one friend but as long as she's one whom I can trust completely, then I guess I'll be contented. Was surfing blogs just now... everyone's talking about promos n results. Well, I wouldn't say my papers were screwed because I was already prepared to fail. Everything just turned out to be what I expected. I am upset but I can't cry because people don't expect me to. Then again, I'm not THAT upset neither.

I think I should treat myself better. Study harder, work harder towards my goals. Deep down I know what I want but reality keeps pushing me away from it. So I've decided that maybe I should stop letting myself down like how I always do for the past 17+ years and just work towards what I want regardless of what other people think so that I'll not feel upset like ALL THE TIME or maybe most of the time. I should just stop asking people what they want and start creating that path that I want. I shouldn't think about other people's opinions, I shouldn't always think I'm right and expecting people to behave the way I think they should. Maybe I should be more flexible in judging others. Or maybe I shouldn't even be judging others but rather be more critical of myself instead. Slacking is definitely a no-no from this very second, keep moving cause time never stop for you. I take back all my words regarding taking a break whenever I feel like breaking down. I shall constantly remind myself of what I should be doing and what I'm working towards, making use of every single opportunity that I have and every advantage that I'm given. I mean why am I sitting here complaining about the goddamn education here? I'm just wasting time away. I'm already fated to be born in here so might as make use of it to create my destiny. It's kind of weird how sitting on the toilet bowl can inspire you so much.

I have no idea how long can I sustain this "ultra-diligent" attitude but I will try. I shan't look down on muggers anymore. They are the people whom I look up to. I don't care about people with high IQ cause I know I'll never be like them. I think I've grown up... to become one of them.

KBox Fanatics

2005-10-12T11:41:00.000+08:00

"Announcing the reopening of Yu Xin's Blog"

Huan Ying Guang Ling

(It sounds nicer than "welcome")

I FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY went K Box on Mon. Anyway, I have lotsa things to complain about regarding K Box. Not the session but the damn company itself. But will keep that till next entry.

Went with S02B. Well... it has gotta be the most interesting experience ever. And I'm still suffering from the aftermath of it. All the Westlife n A1. Thanks alot zh n wl. It's quite nice to see everyone letting their hair down and I definitely saw a different side of everyone. Regarding the singing standards marh... Mh ROCKS la. His SHIN! Gosh~~ superstar~~~ But hope he can still talk after all those "screaming" Apparently, the guy in me appeared again cause I sang Jay Chou n some others guyey song. Oh watever... I'm still a girl. And I didn't get to sing my chuang wai!!!!! cause ppl dunno how to sing =( so I become a bit siao siao and sang both the male and female parts -.- We stayed @ Kbox from 2 to 8. supposed to end at 7 but nobody come chase us out so hehehhe. And someone REFUSED TO LEAVE LA!!! haiyo... tired already can....

And I realised my classmates are GAY la. Then again, I suspected it long ago... LOL. Not all la, just some. (Maybe just 2) Nice bonding session... But I wanna go again!! not with the class la... too many people, cannot sing until shuang. So *hint hint* mandy, xx and shao... xinyu & chinyee too... and some others whom I shan't name.

Been watching VCDs like mad these days. Keep buying... I think I spent 3/4 of this month's allowance on VCDs. so again... I'm broke. But happily broke =) I luv vcds. Been watching Pride... so nice~! And I just bought war & beauty yesterday. Thanks mom! So nice!

Exams was horrible. Gonna get retain... watever. Will try to apply to go Poly then... Haiz. I hate F MATHS!!!!! F***ing maths la.

Anyway... things to do:
1) Finish up ALL undone tutorials (esp physics) [Yes, I'm still mugging]
2) Stayover @ sz's house. (That rich kid has an IPOD NANO la...............)
3) Make them come stayover at mine
4) Watch at least one vcd a day.
5) Go shopping. I need a pencil case!
6) Practise my piano and do the damn theory
7) Pack the room
8) PW oral presentation. (Damn that guy, dun screw up for us)
9) Save money (I just contradict myself -.-)
10) Wait for S.H.E's Zhen Ming Tian Nu! (WoosH!)
11) Contact old friends (preferably go KBox!!)
12) Do something about my messy hair.

Ok... so I finally updated.

PMS (again!)

2005-09-16T21:16:00.001+08:00

Seems as though everyone's pms-ing these days. BUT! I'm seriously PMS-ING! Like the cramps r here, the irritating feeling's here plus the period is here. Yar. I'm IRRITATED! PISS! AGITATED! I'm on the verge to screw some ppl just to make them shut up. I can feel the blood boiling whenever I hear ppl making insensitive, ignorant remarks as well as RANDOM COMMENTS. Those ARE NOT welcome when I'm PMS-ing. Those ppl OBVIOUSLY HAVE NOT seen me when I'm in a pms stage. WTH. I hate it when ppl shows off, I detest it even more that they think they are right all the time. I LOATHE IT WHEN THEY TURN OUT TO BE RIGHT! Why is there NO justice in this world? Why is it that elitists are snobs? You may not notice it, but I feel it! WAH LAU! Is there any second when you DO NOT think tt u're GOOD? Where's ur MODESTY?!?!?!?! And I cannot imagine these ppl becoming the future leaders of Singapore. I worry for the future of the country.

I can't stand it when ppl come up to me saying the same things for like at least 5 times (seriously) and those aren't even like IMPORTANT stuff. KNS. KAO BEI MAN! And I dun like it when they think speaking hokkien is crude. WTH. DISCRIMINATION! So what if I can't speak the nice teochew, sophisticated Cantonese? I can only speak Hokkien la. So? And I like to speak chinese la so? I can speak English as well wat. So wat if my vocab isn't all that fantastic? SO? I dun speak the perfect English like u guys LA but I like wat. Not as though I write my GP essay in Singlish. F***.

I know those ppl I met in THE college are mostly nice la but can they NOT have those stupid guidelines/criterias on judging ppl? So wat if I'm NOT chio, NOT smart, NOT hardworking enough, NOT funny, NOT sporty, NOT tall, NOT hip, NOT cool? Geez. We're in a SCHOOL leh. Not social gathering. ~_~ And before these ppl judge others, look @ themselves. I'm bloody piss la.

WO3 TAO3 YAN4 REN2 JIA1 YONG4 YOU3 SE4 YAN3 JING4 KAN4 BIE2 REN2! [dun understand? pls consult professor ang (me!) who's the expert in chinese =)] FREAKS! I'm weird la, I'm weird la.

Oh yar, the other day, I wanted to commit suicide. I think I'm becoming psycho. Not cause I stress, but because I just wanna see wat will happen if I get into a car accident. Will I die? Will I survive? But due to the fact that I'm still sane, hence I'm still alive here updating my dearest blog a.k.a bitching board. Kinda scary right the things that go through my head. Don't worry! I'm not to the extent of doing stupid stuff. I luv myself enough and there's still lotsa things I wanna do.

P.S: My current form of motivation for studying has become my dear classmate, Wesley Lye. His words keep ringing in my head. HELP!

The Lost World

2005-09-05T10:11:00.000+08:00

I had a weird dream last night.

I dreamt of my primary school days, where we were playing at the giant steps. We sat down, basically it's just me, rs, man, jy and the twins, to talk. Then the conversation ended up about our ambitions. When it was my turn, I turned mute. As in I couldn't talk at all, nothing came out of my mouth. Other classmates came over and everyone had a clear idea of what they going to do in the future but I was just sitting there being the dumb me.

Ok, because I slept for so damn long, had another dream but shan't talk about tt, irrelevant.

I think this is so weird. I guess it's because the future seems too gloomy for me tt I've been thinking about it too much. I dunno wat I wanna study, where I'm going to study. Actually I wanna go Switzerland but apparently I dun really wanna study business which is wat's offered there. I wanna go NUS, cause there's hostel rooms with air conditioning but guess tt's a stupid reason, ppl took it as a joke when I told them this. Studying in Japan sounds cool but I think it's out of the qn. Don't even take Jap. Going to UK is near impossible. No interest in U.S or China. Aussie is a place for HOL! not studies. NZ... hmm... dun wanna end up like eh... we noe.

Haiya, I think my path has been planned out too nicely tt now when it's time to make a decision, I can't. Actually, the chances of getting a scholarship is also like damn slim la. I would think of people in my class, in the school. I feel so inferior. Plus gotta go through those damn interviews which I'm damn lousy at but ppl assumed otherwise. If I dun get a scholarship, I'll definitely have to stay in Singapore to study, which is not a bad thing but now is like the best age to venture out to see the outside world. We're too kept up in this nice, cosy cage of ours tt we often dunno wat's going on outside. Most of our info came from secondary sources which we are unable to judge its credibility.

My grandma tells me tt if I can study in sg, I should just stay cause my parents can't afford to send me overseas. Sad... And I can't possibly earn money to pay for my sch fees cause being just an O-Level cert holder, jobs don't exactly pay enough to let me go overseas.

Haiya, sometimes I dun even think I deserved to go those top stupid, premier schools cause I'm just this lazy pig who laze around all day and only mug when the fire is near. No, I'm not implying I'm smart... I study in the correct manner when time draws near. Argh. watever, I'm trying not to sound arrogant. So conclusion for now is tt, just mug for promos, get promoted then talk abt those nitty gritty stuff later. I wonder how my friends in AJ are doing, sure ok la... they so hardworking. Plus phyllis too. Tt smart, diligent girl.

Actually I should start planning for dec hol already. Yar, maybe tt will motivate me to study harder.

Food For Thought

2005-09-04T20:51:00.000+08:00

Just came back from a scrumptious dinner at Railway Chinese Restaurant. Food is nice! Scallop rox! WooHoo! and I ate Mango Chicken... but I prefer lemon chicken. Sweet food is WEIRD la. I mean cooked food tt's sweet. I'm a sour person I guess... awwww. and no, I'm NOT pregnant.

Found out something. Chatting online is weird. It's like I mostly chat with people I'm comfortable around with, who are usually the ones I see often. So wat's the point of having over 100 people on my chat list when I usually only chat with maybe 3? This messenger thingy is for people to like keep in touch but sometimes, it's like just weird to say "hi" online when in actual fact, we couldn't be bothered to greet each other in person. And I hate it when a conversation starts with a "hi" and ends up with "XXX is appearing offline and may not reply" A conversation must be you2 shi3 you3 zhong1. TMD

On the other hand, it works the other way too. I can dun talk to someone at all in person but ended up chatting into the night online. So this feeling is like totally weird. Like when I thought we were a step closer to being friends, the REAL relationship is still the same as before. Back to the hi-bye type. Strange.

Understand or not ah? Not really coherent right? Nvm. Excuse my poor English.

Btw, I realised (rather long ago)... I can't have eye contact with people. I shy la... wat to do. Sad right? I just find it weird... no... there's no electrifying feeling. (Only one guy managed to do tt but god knows where he is now. Dun even noe him.) I just cannot make myself have eye contact la, I'll have this uncomfortable feeling. argH. WATEVER! Dun try to look into my eyes, I'll get scared =X

Desperate Moment

2005-09-03T14:03:00.000+08:00

I NEED TO GO K BOX!!!!

I'm so desperate I even offered to treat XX. For the 5 hours session which cost around $15. But didn't go in e end.

Because of this stupid desperation, I went through a roller coaster ride of emotions. And I wanna go with shao! cause very "smooth" Hahahaha

Anyway, note to self. I can go wherever I want after 7 Oct. It's just a month and a few days more. Start mugging! Mug the ass off! STUDY!!! Then play like siao! Camp overnight @ KBox also can. So...

STUDY!

BBQ @ Yew Tee!

2005-09-01T11:21:00.000+08:00

Yesterday I heard frm shao tt she couldn't be bothered to read my previous post on Aries. Xx and man too. WTH. the 2 I understand but SHAO?!?! lazy bum. at least I updated.

Went out with the usual 3 in the afternoon. Realised I dun really share the taste with them when it comes to movies. Wanted to watch March of the Penguins but they dun want. The maid too... WAH LAU. why lydat?!?!?!?! So we ended up talking rubbish, suaning xx and walking around Orchard aimlessly. Saw LOTS of rj ppl but have no idea who are they. Then saw a few ex-ny gals. Yeah...

Then I went off to Yew Tee for some BBQ organised by my old CCA. Supposed to meet @ 6. I reached @ 6.10. Only 4 turned up then. Waited ALL THE WAY until 6.40 -.- I hate it when ppl are damn late la. To think I was so guilty for turning up late.... argh

Anyway, it was good to see yishu, yihui and the juniors. Realised got huge gap between us and the sec1s. Too bad la... we old already... Then I started calling Yihui "zhi zhang lao ren" (Retarded elderly) for I-forgot-wat-reason. At first was trying to BBQ marshmallow but gave up cause too many ppl at the pit. Went to function room, ended up playing UNO which I guess half of us have already forgotten how to play. Wanted to play daidee but no poker cards. UNO was fun! cause kept putting all the "draw" cards and poor Yilina... LOL and I won twice!! HAH HAH! Then we finally moved on to Daidee when someone brought in the poker cards. WOOHOO! Fun but I realised all our brains worked kinda slowly cause we sort of forgot how to play and ended up mixing up UNO with daidee. Were laughing non-stop during the game and had no idea wat's going on.

Someone brought Jolly Shandy and some ppl actually got sort of "high"... hahah esp a sec one which I've already forgotten the name... paiseh la. We just ended up talking about boliao stuff like scaring them about JC life, complaining about ny physics, how we all become shu nu upon entering JC and how some guys can seem so despo, etc. It was fun! Seems like old times... I miss all-girls school... Awww. But I think the next time I get to see this bunch of ppl will be quite long after plus the current Sec4 batch gonna graduate soon so if my batch goes back, then it'll be kinda weird. So touched to see them so bonded... actually I think it's just few of us... hahah. I miss cca times. Sigh

I realised until now, I haven realised my mission to become a shu nu. HOW?!?!?! Irritating. Must jiayou jiayou jiayou! and xx, stop suaning me. I CAN become a shu nu one k!

Going off to study later... promos' in less than a month. KNS KNS KNS KNS
Good luck ppl! Study hard

P.S: It's HOL!!!!!!!! YES YES YES YES YES!!!! tt means I dun needa see some ppl!!!! YAY YAY YAY YAY! I'm going mad

Born under the star of Aries

2005-08-29T18:42:00.000+08:00

The Sun blazed in dynamic Aries, a fire sign on your birthday. The Sun in astrology stands for your inner nature, the light of your essential character. Aries, the first sign of the Zodiac, is a masculine sign ruled by the warrior planet Mars, whose motto must be "Crash through, or crash!". A cardinal (creative and inventive) sign, Aries, the Ram, governs leadership and initiative. Aries people are bold and self-confident, although they tend to be overly impulsive.
The Sun, the ruler of our inner nature, is very well placed in Aries, the sign of its exaltation. This energy is very attractive, even compelling, and few can resist being carried along in the jetstream. Ariens are always overflowing with ideas, schemes and plans to conquer the world, for a well-aspected sun in Aries radiates power and vitality. Many a moth has been burned in its flame! Life, of course, is one long party (which the more mothlike among us may find a just little wearing...).

Ariens are great organisers, full of flair and originality, although usually lacking discipline and the capacity for prolonged effort (minions must be found to do the slog work!). You are intuitive and articulate, with the capacity to inspire others, especially in projects which have a clear outcome and do not require a long lead-time.
You have masses of energy and courage and will rush in where angels fear to tread, for the Arien ego can be rather overbearing. Undue optimism, or impatience and desire for self-aggrandisement can result in wasted effort or even severe setbacks and disappointment.

The emblem for Aries is the Ram, a determined fighter and a powerful adversary, with a strong urge to express himself over the widest possible field of endeavour. Is the grass greener on the other side of the hill? Of course it is, isn't it, Aries?

Creative Aries, a cardinal sign, loves to be the leader and can organise fantastic and impressive ventures. Unfortunately, despite your desire to be the front-runner in all you do, sometimes you do get bored with the whole affair and can just wander off, or sit back and allow the lesser folk to have their way. This can see the whole house of cards collapsing, but happily your enthusiam is easily roused and when you set your mind to it you can inspire others to stick to those essential jobs that sometimes seem no more than the merest details to the noble Ram. You see, painful as this may seem, you really need the team as much as the team needs you!

Aries rules the head, brain and eyes, so people with Aries active in their charts are subject to head injury, headaches, general problems with organs in the head and fevers (although the nose is ruled by Scorpio). You are all extremists and for this reason can fall prey to stress-related ailments and mental problems. However, although you can be highly-strung, your great fund of energy enables you to survive where other less exuberant folks might succumb.
Your colours are red and white. Aries rules metallic iron and your birthstone is the brilliant diamond, symbolising clear strength, purified under pressure. Nature creates the precious diamond out of crumbly, coal-black carbon, by applying intense heat and pressure for a very long time. Flowers for Aries include the red poppy, geraniums, honeysuckle and hollyhocks.

P.S: Once again, I gope the link frm huilian's blog ^_^

Love*3

2005-08-26T22:07:00.000+08:00

Reasons Why I Should Love Myself...

1) No choice, no one else wanna take up the job

2) I'm the only one who is able to accept all flaws

3) I have to live with myself 24/7. Can't possibly hate myself

4) Self-Love is VALUABLE and unconditional

5) I'm worth it!

6) "Before you want people to love you, you must start to love yourself." (Cheesy quote)

7) I'm the hope for the better future =X

8) I'm the respected member of society as well! (really?)

9)I'm just bored

10) I'm outta my mind.......

My Day =)

2005-08-26T21:52:00.000+08:00

I think I should blog about my day. I'm just too bored.

1st lesson: Physics lecture - Waves.

It's definitely one of the topics which I can't stand. I have no idea why but I just dislike it. Edwin Lim's nice. At least I understand wat he's teaching though he's super temperamental. Conclusion, I enjoy his lecture.

2nd lesson: GP - In class essay a.k.a GP TEST!

Crap. No idea wat I wrote. Though quantity does not equate to quality, I only wrote one and 3/4 page. Well done Yu Xin, well done. The questions are also rather irrelevant to wat we've discussed in class anyway. Geez

3rd Lesson: BREAK!!!

Celebrated Hung, Eunice, Wen Loong & David's Birthdays which were long over but the cake was delicious! I luv Blackforest! I assumed it's blackforest cake cause it tastes like it. And stupid Huilian came over to gope half my slice of cake. In addition, I spend $1.10 on lunch today.... exceeded budget. Sigh

4th Period: Econs Lecture - Monopsony

I like Econs. At least I understand wat's going on. Ms Ngin's cool. However econs is also the lesson where people start showing off =X

5th "Lesson": PW + English Lesson frm XXX

I'm obsessed with PW. I'm doing it every other day. And someone's obsessed with the English language =X ok ok... just kidding

After which, I went for CIP @ Touch Community Service and then to J8 for dinner.

- End of Day -

This is so boring I'm going to fall asleep while typing. ArgH! Shall start on something new.

Just another random thought

2005-08-26T21:36:00.000+08:00

From the zeroth law of thermodynamics, we learnt that when object A and object B are in thermal equilibrium with object C respectively, object A and B are in thermal equilibrium with each other.

HOWEVER! I realised today, this law doesn't exactly work for distance travelled. I know that my house is super near the school. I can actually walk home within 10 mins. RJC is also very near Bishan Junction 8. And because my friends have been saying that I'm super lazy whenever I take bus home frm J8, so I decided to walk. It's not my first time walking but it could be the last. It's DAMN BLOODY HELL FAR lar!!!!!!!! I can walk to school frm home and I can walk to J8 from school DOES NOT mean I can walk from J8 back home! I dunno if I've blogged about this b4 but WATEVER. My legs are currently aching frm walking and walking the whole day. DAMMIT. I should have just taken the bus.

This is just a random blog entry to tell everyone who's reading this, I'm fine! I've already released out my stress, anger, frustration, depression, etc. Yup!

P.S: SZ! it's been YEARS since I last saw you la! must meet up soon! I want the mooncakes!

Loss of Fun-loving Personality

2005-08-24T17:48:00.000+08:00

Lately, I've been so in touch with school life that I'm totally losing the other part of me. I read somewhere that everyone has 2 different personalities. I think that's true. At least for me. The other day, xx told me that I've become a more serious person ever since I came to RJ. Well, I didn't realise it until she told me. Then when I thought about it, it seems kinda true.

These 2 weeks have been rather hectic. EOM, written report due, lotsa tutorials and tests, GP presentation as well. Plus feeling like a dead fish every single day the moment I reach home. Sleeping after 11.30 and waking up at 5 cause I can't sleep. I haven't been sleeping well lately, thinking about lotsa stuff. I have no idea what I'm doing, just doing and doing and doing. But I guess most of the time I'm spending time on PW. Pple's been telling me that I spend too much time on that but wat to do? We share the grade as a group. At least for the report part. No point dragging the rest down with my laziness. And some complications have occurred along the way and I seriously have no idea how to deal with them. Been putting stuff aside and procrastinating them whenever possible. I'm so into school life. Maybe that's why I'm more serious now.

I find it difficult to play and joke around, there's always something tt's restricting me. And ppl around me are more serious ba. Cause everyone has grown up. I dun have huilian, xiutang, xx, val, yiyou, mandy, sz, huiling, chinyee, xinyu to fool around with me anymore. Not even felicia & jiayin. I miss my crazy bunch of friends. The kind when we can just be sarcastic and joke around, making fun of one another, bitching about everything under the sun. I think it's the period of time again when I start missing my friends.

Yesterday wanted to ask xx/ mandy out but they both not free. Always so fated lydat, whenever I'm free, my friends aren't. I think I dun have the good luck. I'm not lucky like when I'm feeling down, there'll be someone who calls me up coincidentally for a chat or something. But I think it's all part of my life and I just gotta learn to deal with it.

I keep wanting to hold on to the past but it just keeps drifting further and further away from me. The busier I am, the more emotional I'll feel, from all the stress and stuff. The more I need my friends, the more they dun seem to be there. I'm not the type tt will cry and say "I wanna tell u my troubles!" I think main reason is that I seldom show my troubles directly and I dunno how to call for "help" but I can't expect ppl to be on standby 24 hrs each day just for me.

I dunno wat to do but as wat I'll usually do, take things one at a time. If I can overcome this, I can overcome everything else that follows. Promos are coming but I just feel like doing crazy before I seriously start studying. Just so to release all the rubbishy emotions that I'm feeling within me.

I'm so emotional that I dunno wat to do. DAMMIT! And I wanna learn how to swear in 7 different languages!

P.S: My PW mates (Lehui & Charles) have been rather supportive of the YuXin's Fund for the Poor & Needy. They promised to contribute 10 cents and 5 cents per day respectively. Such kind friends right?

Urgent fund needed to save life!

2005-08-24T17:41:00.001+08:00

It's been quite some time since I last updated. Well, this week, I'm on a super tight budget. allowing only an expenditure of $1 each day for rest of this week and I'll be surviving on $0.20 for whole of next week. Yup.

Currently, I'm hoping to raise fund for the poor and needy (tt's me) and ur generous donation will be greatly appreciated. Please send ur cheques to my house, just drop me an email and I'll send the address to you. Or to save all troubles, please pass the money to yours truly in RJC. Or another alternative is calling me up and I'll meet you wherever you are as long as u're on the main island of Singapore. Thank you for your kind and generous contribution. Looking forward to seeing money rolling in.

Full of Shit

2005-08-16T21:51:00.000+08:00

I'm excreting pus AGAIN. from the eye. Having an eye infection... or rather, infection on the eyelid. (I think I have BAD karma) I'm getting rather piss... every 15 mins or so, my eye sight gets blurred. Why? 'cause pus' oozing out my my right eye. Gross right? Green, greasy pus... yucks! Feel as though there's shit coming out la. Suddenly reminded that there's this chinese saying of bleeding from 7 holes, mine's shitting from 7 holes. Sounds disgusting... yucks.

And the most irritating thing was that the doc didn't give me an MC for tmr!!!! How wicked is that?!?!?! But I managed to miss half of school today cause got excuse to go see doctor =) (I think frm memory, I have already accumulated up to 5/6 blue slips. WOW!) Thank gdness tmr's only until noon. Then again, gotta stay back tmr for some chinese general knowledge competition thingy until 4. I feel like mugging for it, then again, I'm not that crazy.

Gotta go back to doing work. When will my pile of homework ever disappear?!?!

and the mugging continues...........

Happy 'cause I'm Busy!

2005-08-15T20:11:00.000+08:00

HarloE Ppl!! I'm supposed to be doing my Econs essay now which was due like last thurs but sian la. I have no idea why did I even greet the ppl tt r reading it. I'll most likely be the one reading this entry over and over again. geez

Anyway, life's pretty good these days. super occupied with work, esp PW so no time to go think about nonsensical stuff. When I think less, I'll be happier and crazier! PW's driving me nuts but thank goodness that I do have a PW grp who's rather supportive except for idioticguy who's non-existence. I enjoy doing PW more than I enjoy doing work cause it's just much nicer though it can be rather irritating at times. And I'm pretty sure my PW grp is sick of one another but it was a good experience knowing each other better. It was also great having the feeling of wanting to kill one another, or rather just one. Yeah but he wouldn't know~~ hahah

Met up with Hui Lian n Xiutang just now for dinner. Ate macs, the new sauce, Lemon Tango TOTALLY SUX!! DUN TRY!!! this is a WARNING. U can't taste anything worse. I felt as though I'm eating detergent in creamy form. GROSS.

Saw XX n her "gd friend". Went to Pastamania to disturb them. Didn't meant to be a lightbulb but was dreading to go home to do econs la. Come to think of it, I feel so dense la, interrupting their date. SORRY!! so paiseh. Zhen shi de. Nxt time shan't disturb u guys, scandalous pair. LOL. But then again, I'll miss hanging out with XX once she starts going on her dates with him. Haiya. (It may not be true tt they're together but they do have great chemistry~)

Life's good. So busy tt homework's piling up. I think cause I'm totally slacking now la. gosh! shall continue with my econs after. Sayoonara~~

Happy 40th Birthday!

2005-08-09T16:07:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday to you!

Happy birthday to you!

Happy birthday, dear Singapore!

Happy birthday to you!

My dear nation turned 40 today.

Today also marks the 3rd year and one day since I stepped into KBox... LOL

Random Thought

2005-08-09T10:21:00.000+08:00

Today during breakfast, a thought came to mind.

Why do I like guys?

Then I imagine myself being hanky panky with girls.

The idea totally grossed me out and made me lose my appetite.

Hence, I like guys.

P.S: No offence to les, but I just think it's gross if I become one.

When Stamford Raffles Held the Torch

2005-08-06T21:24:00.000+08:00

Hohoho! Was thinking might as well have a blog entry on typical Rafflesians. Below are just my POV, purely for fun and entertainment. As usual, not to be taken seriously. (At this rate, no one will take my blog seriously)

1) I have heavy eye bags under my eyes everyday.

2) I tell people the eye bags were due to watching tv late into the night

3) I never tell people that I'm mugging my ass off

4) Getting below C for any subject is NOT acceptable

5) I speak PERFECT english. Either that or PERFECT chinese

6) Ruggers are COOL!

7) I came in with less than 10 pts, tt means I'm GOOD

8) I'm a loser without being in council or any exco

9) It's best if I'm CT Rep, President of XXX and a student councillor (preferably in EXCO too)

10) Aim for Promos: Eligible for at least 2 S Papers

11) I crave for scholarships (hopefully without bonds)

12) I'm smarter than the teachers, hence I can CRITICIZE, CORRECT and IGNORE them

13) The class consists of ME, ME n ME

14) If I'm a guy, my pants must be lower than my hips. If I'm a gal, the skirt must be 3 inches above my knee

15) gals who tuck in their blouse are geeks, so are guys who are tall n scrawny

16) I'm COOL

17) Geeks, nerds, muggers should be out of my territory

18) Then again, I'm mugging away everyday

19) Everyone is a competitor

20) Everything is a waste of time, I could be home studying

21) I stare at people who are speaking chinese

22) No one is my true friend here, BEWARE!

23) I'm an all-rounder

24) I have an ego larger than the universe!

25) I'm e BOSS!

Auspicium Melioris Aevi

True Blue Singaporean

2005-08-06T18:18:00.000+08:00

National Day's coming! and once again, I can feel the patriotism arising within me =) Every morning I have this urge to kick the "sexy" ass of this guy from the class next to mine cause he ALWAYS fidget during the national anthem.

Anyway, wat is it like to be a true Singaporean?

1) I can scold people in 3 languages and one dialect.
2) I can join a long queue and have absolutely no idea what I'm queuing for.
3) I can shop like crazy during the Great Singapore Sale without feeling guilty.
4) I stop eating chicken when they first announce the bird flu and continue eating it after one week
5) I luv Giordano and Hang Ten! They're full of sales!
6) I smuggle 30 boxes of chewing gum whenever I'm back from overseas.
7) I jaywalk every day except when I see the police man.
8) Free stuff is a MUST TAKE!
9) I go crazy and sing national day songs while walking along the streets of Orchard road.
10) I criticise ANYTHING n EVERYTHING.
11) I complain everyday about every single thing tt happens.
12) I buy anything that's on sale without thinking is it worth the money.
13) I wear only solid colour clothes, namely black, blue, white, pink.
14) I only know the names of the top schools and nothing else
15) I will wanna send my kids for piano, taekwando, ballet, art n craft, tuition, pilates, yoga lessons.
16) I aspire my child to become a doctor, lawyer, minister
17) I live in a HDB flat but think that condo is my next ultimate aim.
18) 5Cs are not enough, bungalow is better than condo
19) There is no next best alternatives to cars
20) Taking a 30 mins bus ride is LONG
21) I think we should have a casino, then again, maybe not
22) Every long wkend will be a trip up to m'sia!
23) I nv talk about PAP in public
24) I dun help when people are in trouble, it's best to stay out of everything
25) Let's just leave decisions to the govt
26) Even before the results of the general election are out, I already know them.
27) 4D n ToTo is a weekly hobby
28) My year is filled with activities. From hari raya, to chinese new yr, to total defence, to good friday, to labour day, to vesak day, to racial harmony day, to youth day, to national day, to teachers' day, to childrens' day, to deepavali, to christmas day. There's also anti drug abuse, anti-smoking, being clean n green, be courteous, being romantic, etc etc. One day we've end up celebrating the birthdays of our ministers
29) I will get sued for every mistake I make
30) It's NEVER safe to mention LKY
31) I MUST watch watever show tt everyone's talking about
32) I read the LIFE! section everyday (n only tt)
33) I think reading the TIME mag is intellectual
34) PRCs are WEIRD
35) I may live on a small red dot, but my ego is bigger than the whole of China
36) I go to hawker centre and order in Hokkien
37) Eating at mac is unhealthy, burger king's better
38) Who will ever forget our very own ice cream man along the streets of orchard road (tingalingaling!)
39) Eavesdropping to whatever the person at the next table is saying is a talent I'm born with.
40) I have this faded memory of waking up at 4 in the morning to queue for some Hello Kitty toy

On the whole, I enjoy being a Singaporean... lol

P.S: The above are just random comments not to be taken seriously

falalalalalalala

2005-07-28T21:39:00.000+08:00

hi to e world.
im not a demure gal. .
hv been trying hard to be nice tho!
my eyes dun roll tt much nowadays. (they're itching to tho)
I LOVE SWEARING.
pple shld juz stop acting like they're angels. (when they apparently are not)
i hate muggers too. (oh im a mugger too. i meant ABNORMAL hardcore muggers, sorry.)
10 WEEKS are a freaking LONG way to promos, so stop telling me tt promos are coming. cant you count you assholes? 10 WEEKS LEH. 10 WEEKS=2 MTHS + 2 MORE WEEKS.
stop trying to stress me out la u idiots. juz shuddup n mug quietly if u wan. juz dun lemme hear u.
dun like me? TOO BAD.
lalalala.

Wallowing in self-pity again

2005-07-22T22:32:00.000+08:00

Never in my life has I been so angry with myself. I'm just not the same Yu Xin anymore. I dun lose my temper anymore, I just ren3 qi4 tun1 shen1 for everything now. When ppl irritate me, I just smile and pretends nothing happened. What is WRONG with me?! I everything also pretend it doesn't affect me. I still got dao face but it's just cause I'm sian. Everything is so stagnant. The pace of life is so fast, I feel as though I'm still standing at the same spot even though I've moved thousands of steps.

Can u guys (my franz ah... those who noe me well) imagine me not being sarcastic for one day? I've NOT been sarcastic for a very long. Only to those I'm close with or rather comfortable with. SAD LIFE. I'm just this very quiet, introvert gal... Ya. I can't even roll my eyes properly. Ya... I'm a well-mannered child. Thank u =X I miss being lame, high, crazy, slack. I can't even be slack!!!! KNS! Pple keep reminding me there's NOT MUCH time to promos. OKAY! FINE! I know I did badly for CTs and needa buck up but SHUT UP ALRIGHT! There's TEN MORE WEEKS. KNS. I wish I wish I could turn back time and rechoose the school I wanna go to or rather change my subject combination.

Went back to nyps today for some PW interviews. Saw couple of hc ppl. Wanted to cry. I could be there instead of where I am now. Then I thought of my pri sch class. As bad as those days were, I really miss 6I. I miss the guys, the gals, the weird, the fun, the good and the bad. I suddenly thot how nice it would be if the guys were in my class. But then again, they could have changed and I wouldn't know.

School life's boring these days. Don't even have shuai ge to look at. Nothing to look forward to in school. I need the motivation. I'm a normal girl, I still like guys as critical as I am. I enjoy the feeling of nervousness when I see a guy I like... but I have no feeling now. Lalalala... Whatever. Guess I'm going back to wallow in self-pity. Good bye. My heart feels so old.

Depressed

2005-07-19T19:36:00.000+08:00

Told myself I should blog once I've gotten back all my results... but GP will have to wait until after 25th so watever. Finally got back my physics result today. Well... didn't expect much. Got an O. Hence, my beloved results are COOO, which is C for econs la. Failed both maths -.- And no, it's not cause the paper is difficult or the marking is strict. I bet at least 1/3 the cohort scored A for Maths 9233. And I got F for F maths at first but the teachers were kind enough to add 1% to everyone's mark. And I only need 0.3% to pass Maths. Yup... I'm feeling depressed. Rather helpless as well. I so wanna cry!!!

pple come pity me... just kidding

When I saw my physics result, got tt urge to cry. Not because I failed physics but just cause I realised that Science is really not my forte. I'm not following in class especially for vectors. Physics is definitely a gone case. Feel like giving up but I know I can't. I found out that when I'm depressed, things just keep coming into my mind and I'll feel worse. I can't cry in school. It just feel as though I'm NOT allowed to... arghhhh. I really should concentrate on my studies and STOP thinking about many other stuff... this is getting SOOOO irritating!!! I have no idea why I'm upset, it's not as though I've never fail before. I don't knowwwwww....

Have no idea how to continue, hence shall go mug. or practise guitar (which is so damn difficult)

Blank Blank Blank

2005-07-09T14:53:00.001+08:00

Second entry for the day. Just wanna record what happened lately.

Changed of GP teacher, I miss Mr. Ali. Got Mrs. Uma Chong (cheong?) She's nice and interesting but I think Ali's more hip. LOL. Female teachers tend to be more naggy la [except for my physics teacher x)] And Mr. Ali has a better sense of humour. Hers are more lame... But I was rather amused by her reaction to that the fact that Bryan's from dance. Her eyes were the size of ping pong balls? Oh plus she's Indian who married a Chinese which I think is pretty cool. Mix blood children leh!

Got back my econs MCQ & DRQ, did rather alright with them. Just passed by physics mcq with a grand total of 16/30. Not bad right? I'm proud of myself actually... and here's to everyone: When in doubt, go for B! Will get back GP after 25th (GP teachers are damn slow la) and Maths maybe next week or the week after. Haiya maths sure fail one la. F maths and maths 9233 because Mr. Tan is damn strict with his marking and plus the fact that I didn't really know how to do the questions. And no comments for Physics. However, it's only common test... will mug harder (OH NO!)

PW's kinda stagnant now. I think temper hasn't been good these days and I just sort of ignore everything that comes to me. BUT! Up till now, I have not blow my top YET. Not bad rite?!?!?!

I realised that during GP these days, there's always this probability of linking the subject of discussion to Christianity. Being a non-Christian myself, I'm not very clear with what's going on with the Bible. HOWEVER!!! I'm not really interested in knowing the details of the Bible. Some stuff about Christianity are rather interesting but I would prefer it if some of my classmates would not argue everything by substantiating them with the Bible.

There's this part when my GP teacher brought up that her son asked where do the dinosaurs go after they died and a classmate said very firmly "They go to hell." And the reason was because dinosaurs did not believe in God. I was like "erm... how do u know?" But didn't voice it out. I don't really wanna have any argument about those Christianity stuff cause it's really sensitive and what I think is only my personal opinion. But I really do get offended when pple tell me that if I don't believe in Christian God, I'll go to hell... I totally have no idea on how to respond to that.

I'm totally fine with my own religion and has no intention of going to church and stuff. Furthermore, my parents will KILL ME. Yeah, so erm... I hope ppl will just stop saying "The Bible says this...", "God will help you...", etc to ME at least. I have this woman who comes every month just to talk to me about what the Bible says and I'm getting scared of her. I just pray that she doesn't tell me to go to her church one day. It's alright to tell me stuff regarding Christianity but don't preach, don't talk to me as though I'm Christian and don't tell me that everyone should believe in God. And I will not step into a church unnecessarily unless u're getting married in a church and you've invited me. Yeah

I'm not sure if I've offended anyone with stuff I wrote but those are just my own opinions. Yup, that's all. I'm perspiring in fear of ppl coming after me now. LOL

Definition of Good Depends on What Defines Bad and Vice Versa

2005-07-09T14:09:00.000+08:00

Been discussing about Science VS Moral Ethics during GP. There's always this case of scientific development is good but it all depends on who is the one dealing with it.

Everyone (esp those Beauty queens) hopes for world peace but it's only because we've been through so much such as terrorism, wars, etc. We yearn for world peace because we experienced the opposite. Dynamite was invented for a good cause but it turned out to create destruction. There's always a good and bad side of everything. You need to a balance of good and bad so as to cheer for the good and jeer at the bad.

We luv to live in place that's free of crime, fear, some place where we can experienced peace and comfort. Singapore's a country with law and order. How do we know that? By comparing it with other places (eg we dun see children holding guns and shooting pple's head off which happens in US). Our theft rates aren't that high as compared to some places. However, we often do take these things for granted cause we forget that other places do not experienced as much luxury as us. Though I as a student will always think that the constant reminder of us being lucky and taking things for granted is irritating. But sometimes it's true.

One thing I can't stand is that pple luvs to say "I hope for world peace. I want the world to live in peace." That's disgusting. What is world peace? You need destruction to show us what is peace. Just like the saying "you'll only know how to stand up when you fall" That's like so true. How do we define what is good? By knowing what is bad.

How do I know if I did well in this test? Only when there are people who did badly. How are the As and Bs given? By having the bell curve which shifts according to the performance at national level. Believe me, even if u scored 90+ marks in a test (which is highly impossible @ JC level) but everyone else scored 90 odd as well, then u won't think u did that well. There's a comparison going on here.

Don't assume something to be bad or good for you because you think so. There are always other factors to consider before you come to a conclusion. There's lotsa things going on around the world these days and I kinda think it's rather a good time to start reflecting about what I've been doing and moaning, groaning about. I guess I've been rather childish by complaining about school and stuff 'cause there are good things that are happening around me but I just continue to wallow in self-pity. Sad rite? I don't think so actually. I experienced the good and bad and I think it's pretty good.

No doubt, I will continue to hate and love but I'm starting to take things into my own stride and will continue to experience all those emotions each day. But at the end, I'll treat it as though it's part of the balance of life. You need happiness to balance sorrow you know. Just like sometimes I just wanna ask those enthu pple if there are days when they lost all their energy.

I'm growing up everyday! I'm enlightened =) But I'll still bitch to my friends... lol

Edison's the GUY

2005-06-29T15:02:00.000+08:00

My ultimate goal in life before I turn the age of 30 is to slap that dumbass Edison Chen a.k.a Mr. Snigger. I just can't stand the look of him lately. I used to ignore my friends' comments of him being shuai or whatever cause he looks so qian4 bian3 but now, his Initial D poster is EVERYWHERE! Hello?!?! I thought it's a movie starring JAY CHOU! Plus I read the Life! report on him. It just confirms wat I think of him. I don't even think he's cute... argh. Yayaya... I'm under the influence of the power of the media. So what?! He can go to hell with his supposedly "suave" bad-boy attitude. I prefer Jay Chou and Shawn Yue. Who cares if you don't think they're good looking. They have better personality =P

Today's F Maths paper was not as bad as physics but it's definitely a "Hello ungraded (U)!" Yup. I'm very kan4 de2 kai3 now cause whatever lor. Tmr's my last paper... MAths! Not much hope for it but just wanna get over and done with.

Screwed.

2005-06-28T17:48:00.000+08:00

The very first sentence that came straight into my mind the moment I stepped out of school was "Today has gotta be the most screwed up day of my life" Then again, I often thought that every other day was most terrible, horrible, disgusting or the worst day of my life.

There's always a bad day for everyone but I realised almost every school day make my life miserable. Nothing with the school work. It's the people around me. They hate me... not literally hate but there's always this HUGE gap between me and the people. I mean it's weird. I didn't have this much difficulty mingling with people. I tried to have a decent conversation but apparently it always end up as a monologue. Or maybe I'm mumbling hence they can't hear me?

It's 3 months already... nothing's improving... I'm sad. I wouldn't say I dun mix well with the people there cause apparently I'm like thin air to them. No mixing... Just floating. I wouldn't wanna change to suit them but if I dun, I'll never fit in. I never thought my ren2 yuan2 was THIS bad... Sucks. How would you expect me to survive?!?!?! Gosh.

But since yesterday, I'm back to the world of reality where I see those hypocritical stuff... argh. Send me back where I belong, to the REAL people. (xx... I totally understand what you mean)

Btw, today physics paper is just another addition to "Worse things can still happen even though life's pretty bad now" I'm screwed. This is bad. Results sux + lack of social life = No life. The time has finally come when I failed as a person. I HATE CROWDS, it just make me feel more alone. yayaa... laugh at me... whatever

One word --> Pathetic

Sickening Boredom

2005-06-17T15:03:00.000+08:00

I'm so bored

I'm so bored

I'm SO BORED! I seriously dun understand why some ppl can actually sit for hours studying. I can't! I absolutely CANNOT! My record so far was an hour with at least 10 mini breaks in between. The only time I can sit for at least 3 hours straight is when I'm doing maths or something that requires me to think and write. Writing notes doesn't count. I'm just basically rewriting stuff from my notes. BleaH. I can't believed I survived when I was studying for Os... I must have gone mad then.

Studying econs now... dun understand... reading the notes make me sleepy. Can't do tys cause dun even understand the stuff. Yup. Plus I dun have much time left! OMG!

Whatever... back to mugging. Or rather stoning with my notes in front of me.

PS: I luv delifrance's mixed fruits tart! super crispy n nice! Highly recommended by me. And it makes a gd companion when u're mugging.

Time Flies

2005-06-14T16:55:00.000+08:00

You know, it's kinda amazing to know how time flies. It has already been like 18 days since the start of hol and hol's gonna end soon. Sigh, will miss the free and easy life I'm leading now when I'm back under the manipulation of education.

Has been doing basically NOTHING since the start of hol. Nothing except watching vcds, stoning at home, gone out for PW and just wasting time away. I'm supposed to be studying! Where on earth has all the self-discipline gone. Damn! And I'm only left with 1wk and 1/2 for my common tests. Thank goodness they aren't gonna be counted. However if I dun start now, I'm pretty sure I'll die for promos. Haiya, hell with exams!

List of stuff I need/want to do before my beloved June hol ends:
1) Study! regardless whether I like it or not
2) Watch Mr. n Mrs. Smith!
3) Go shopping and will eventually ended up buying stuff that I need (eg bag)
4) Finish up ALL tutorials
5) Get new guitar strings
6) FInish up the stuff that I need to do for PW
7) Clean the room
8) Get new bookshelves

Then when these are done, school starts, exams begin, life goes back to THAT routine and I'll get back into mugger mode. Seeing people in my class makes my life dull n boring T_T

Lucky 7!

2005-06-11T14:10:00.000+08:00

Your Expression Number is 7

Very intelligent, you are usually thinking, introspecting, or analyzing.
You have a good mind, and you are especially good at finding out the truth.
Very little ever escapes your observation and deep understanding.

You tend to obsess over wisdom and hidden truths.
You are likely to become a authority on any subject you undertake.
Operating on a different wavelength, most people don't know you that well.

Very logical and rational, at times you tend to lack emotion.
So much so, that you often have times coping with emotional situations.
You are not very adaptable - you may tend to be overly critical at times.

What's Your Expression Number?

Unfortunately, the above is quite accurate~ other than the very intelligent part ba...

My Intelligence being tested

2005-06-11T13:59:00.000+08:00

Your IQ Is 110

Your Logical Intelligence is Above Average
Your Verbal Intelligence is Above Average
Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius
Your General Knowledge is Above Average

A Quick and Dirty IQ Test

Woohoo~~ I'm a Maths genius! yaya... but it's not showingggggg plus my IQ is only 110... WTH ... Actually I cheated... I took the test twice... wahhahahah but my IQ only increased by 10 =X

The Fight for.................. Chairs =X

2005-06-06T09:18:00.000+08:00

It's currently 9.49pm in SingaPoRe! What am I doing? Supposed to be studying but u noe... I have this sudden urge to blog. Yup... nothing happened much except went out yesterday to watch Madagascar! n today for PW. Kinda wasted time for PW... didn't do much, I think I was like making use of the opportunity to look around at Bugis Junction. PaiseH! But overall... okie la... things are forming, just not concrete.

Oh yea, I bought Corrinne May's CD... the one who sang the songs for "Chase". Yup... original singer for "Journey". Dun ask me why. I just heard like 2 songs from the cd at the cd shop den I just took the album off the rack. Yeah... I'm rich =X The album's not bad la... her singing's nice too. I think her voice got this force that attracted me to buy her cd... not bad rite? I would usually hesitate for at least a month before I'll buy a cd. Life's so weird la... who on earth would have thought I would actually buy her album when I only have the faintest idea of who she is. I guess I'm the type that will follow instincts rather than logic or reasoning? Hmm...

I'm suffering from INSOMNIA!!! AH!!! the crazy woman's suffering from insomnia!! typical sg rj mugger who's dead tired everyday is suffering from insomnia!! OMG OMG OMG!!! ok... I guess since it's the hol and I've slept too much these days so hence I can't sleep nowadays. Or maybe cause I've been sleeping on my parents' bed... not used to it. Actually went back to sleep on the floor... I'm destined to lead a poor life since I enjoyed sleeping on the floor (with mattress la) and I refuse to take taxi cause I find it extremely ex plus I seldom spend $$ on clothes. Yup... okie okie... my $$ flows to some other places like...... (highly confidential)

Oh yeah, today was at Bugis Junction and wanted to cross the road to that Bugis street la. u noe, ppl luv to jaywalk cause they're tooooooo impatient to wait for the light to go GREEN. Anyway, there's this cao4 ah lian wearing blue spags with long dyed golden hair who crossed the road when the red man is still on. Ok, a taxi came out from the taxi stand and was kind enough to wait for those jaywalkers to finish crossing. However due to her pathetically SNAIL-LIKE walking pace, the taxi uncle got impatient and went "HONK!". Guess her reaction?

YES! She stood there and glared at the driver before taking her last five steps to reach the other side of the road. WTH! She's the one at fault lor... jaywalking still walk like snail lydat. PIG LA! Was so tempted to scold her or insult her or use some sarcasm on her but I refrained from doing that cause she got 2 other cao4 ah lians with her. I'm a civilised citizen so I shall NOT do that. But I did manage to roll my eyes at her before I got on the bus! WOOHOO! But I'm still BUSHUANG! Some ppl ah... really have got the NERVES. In the wrong but still insistent that they're right. yea yea.... -.-"

Oh ya, at the bus stop something interesting happened. The true reflection of singaporeans' kiasu-ism. Plus my mom's part of it T_T The bus was about 30m away from the bus stop and has stopped cause there's one bus and a car in front of it. However, half the people are already rushing to the end of the bus stop to flag for the bus. When the bus in front drove away, the HUGE group of ppl rushed to the other end of the bus stop. It's quite interesting to see the ppl rushing back and forth. When the bus finally slowed to a stop, everyone was doing their estimation on where the bus still stop and fighting to stand in front of the entrance.

The doors opened and WAH LAU... at least 5 ppl, 2 ah beis, 1 uncle, 2 aunties (including my dear mummy) fighting to get up the bus. Typical sight at the bus stop opposite Bugis Junction. In fact, typical sight anywhere when the bus is supposedly the popular bus. Due to my curiousity, I asked my mom and here's the conversation.

Me: Ma... so kan cheong for wat? Bus got enough space for all of us la.

Mother: Stand until reach home very tired leh, my legs cannot take it.

Alamak, everyone's tired la but pls do not fight for seats. It's not a pretty sight especially when u aren't THAT old. But I do hate it when there're old ppl standing on the bus and some stupid pple (esp teenages with those golden ah beng/ ah lian hair) just sit there and pretend they've gone blind temporary. Where are ur damn bloody manners?!

Anyway, finally got up the bus. No seat anyway. Stood at side. Bus stopped outside Little India MRT station. At least 10 got down the bus. Mom was like all prepared to snatch a seat but due to my habitual behaviour, I just stood there and let others pass. Mom can't do anything cause I'm blocking her and someone's blocking me. She got slightly pissed, say I very slow. HELLO? I'm only 17... why would I wanna snatch seats with ppl? I'm not very lazy u noe and I dun like to sit when taking the bus. Will get motion sickness. Kiasu ppl... KIASU... the 10+ ppl haven even fully got off their chairs ah, ppl are already moving to the seats as though they're telling others, "That's MINE! BACK OFF!"

Maybe I'll understand when I reach the golden age of 60 or maybe 40+ but now I really dun understand why ppl like to behave as though they're fighting for food when it's only SEATS. CHAIRS. Not even comfortable ones. And no one's making u stand for 2 hrs. U wun travel for 2 hrs on a bus in Singapore for god's sake. Unless u're taking 166 from AMK to clementi. I think I'm from the 60s where ppl walk from let's say my house to nygh? Yar... no harm to walking la though I do get lazy once in a while and make my dad fetch me home frm sch. Heheh

Haiya, maybe it's just my own preference but most of the time I can't be bothered to sit down when taking a bus unless there are seats calling out to me, "YuXin! pls sit down! we're empty! We need ur butt to warm us up!" or everyone got that face "why aren't u sitting down u weirdo? u're the only one standing and there are empty seats."

Human's behaviour are WEIRD

Deep in thoughts

2005-05-25T21:11:00.001+08:00

I've been thinking about lotsa stuff lately (haven I been always). Like wat's my ambition, who r my frans, am I really anti-social, do I regret choosing rj... blah blah blah.

Firstly, wat's my ambition? No idea. I just take things at my own stride. Like I never thought I'll choose this mathsy combi but in the end I did. Never did I see myself wearing the stupid green skirt but I am now. I wanted to go hc, take up LEP (chinese), den maybe go be some journalist or writer or something (I used to be very proud of my zuo wens alright!) But now, I'm taking this er xin double maths, phy, econs combination. It's not really tt bad actually other then physics cause I dun mind maths and econs' quite interesting. Many asked if I'm going to be some engineer or something related but I dun think so? I really CANNOT relate to physics. It's not for me. Haiya... at most I end up being maths teacher la, send all ur children to me n I'll make them SUFFER! hahahahahahahah! Maybe I'll end up being a movie director, a pilot, a popular celebrity, a tai-tai *woosh!* or maybe a pianist... I'm dreaming again...

Let's leave the franz part last la... Hmm... Do I regret choosing RJ? actually yes n no. Yes cause I would have gone to hc and see pple I can relate to like JIAYIN! I miss her loads la! like today got GP common test den were supposed to sit according to index. Haiya, wanted to cry cause I miss seeing her backview and her turning around so that we can yak yak yak away. Then there's yiyou! I think if I dun see her anytime soon, we'll end up at strangers... I miss doing pw with her, travelling all the way down to clementi on 165 just for pw and each session ended up with everyone pissing each other off. Also can see my ex-classmates like Eddie, naga, jingyi... sian ah! I miss everyone. Then I think

I dun miss AJ tt much cause PE there is SIAO! But I do miss some of the pe teachers, they're extremely nice like Ms. Ong! she rox! I just miss the OG n my class plus pple whom I've met along the way during cca times. Even those whom I've only spoken to like once or twice. I miss mdm woon n ms bok! I especially miss the econs period where Mdm woon n xavier will argue over some concepts. funny! I think I need a xavier in my class but I think he'll DIE in it. LOL. I miss phyllis too! so long nv see her le! must call her up one day before she mugs like crazy during the holiday. I even miss akshay la for gdness sake, I think there's something wrong with me. But I guess I was happy during 1st 3 months, felt like home. Can't blame me if I'm pro AJ la. Though building looks as though it's going to collapse anytime, it still felt like home.

On the other hand, I didn't regret choosing RJ cause got Cathy with me! plus xiutang, huilian, val, grace, xx! Though xx is doing her disappearing act once again. RJ is a very erm... conducive environment la, gd facilities plus it's so near my house. I mean I hafta admit I didn't really make the effort to go hang out with the class resulting in my small pathetic group of friends so there's really no one I can blame. And I really like the library... I feel "safe" in it... hahah. Plus I kinda like some of the pple whom I met though there are OBVIOUSLY SOME whom I can't stand at all.

Who are my friends ma... I dun really wanna think about it. I mean, no point tryin to figure out wat everyone's thinking, I wun ever come to a concrete conclusion one la. So everyone's my friend and same philosophy everytime. If u're nice to me, I'm nice to u. If u're NOT, den I'm sorry I hafta treat u tt way. =P I dun think I'm tt anti-social lor. I'm sociable in ny n aJ, just not in rj. I can feel that tension and pressure around in school la, the type tt'll make u feel like hiding in the corner, away from everyone. It's quite gross actually. Everyone's too perfect there, it's WEIRD. I guess just eh... wait n see ba.

I have this feeling I keep blogging on the same stuff... Hmm. Fine, shall try not to blog about school. I think pms is coming... coming... coming...

Sobsobsob...

2005-05-23T14:27:00.000+08:00

Was on my way to Esplande for AJC Symphonic Band n Chinese Orchestra concert when I saw a mom slapping her young daughter on the escalator down to the mrt platform. The girl looks about nine or ten? *my estimation of age sux* Anyway, the mother ah, looks super piss while the daughter's face was red and tear stained la. Being the usual kpo me, i tried to eavesdrop on their conversation.

mom: tell u to go home, still say five mins, five mins. Don't wanna go out home izzit? Want me slap you again?

daughter: sob sob

mom: cry wat cry?

older daugher: dun scold le la.

mom: already give her extra ten mins, still dun wanna go home. How you expect me to compromise? Next time, let her stay outside and dun bring her back.

Through the whole "scolding session", the young girl was just facing the entry door, trying to hide her face. This whole thingy sorta reminded me of myself when I was young. Everytime my mom brings me out, I'll wanna stay out for as long as possible but my mom, being the very lazy mother, will wanna go home as soon as it's time for dinner. (u noe la... save money if eat at home ma) Den I will say dun want, she'll say must, I'll throw tantrum and...........

KABOOM! she's pissed. and the above conversation would be played (except the part of older sister)

I'm beginning to wonder did someone teach them to say those stuff, I mean... it seems as though all parents will say the same stuff. Anyway, tt's not the main point. The thing is tt, when I'm much younger, or even now... whenever I cry, I'll try to hide my face or somehow not let people noe tt my pearly tears are dropping. However, from yesterday's incident, I realised... PLEASE LA. pple got eyes one lor. It's difficult to avoid letting ppl noe u're crying unless u go hide urself in a room alone. I think girls care about their pride too. I mean, though they do often cry (due to being more emotional den guys), they'll try to avoid crying in public or at least crying out loud or the most classic one tt's used by almost everyone

"I'm alright, not crying. just things got into my eyes" Yayaya...

There's this saying "nan2 ren2 you3 lei4 bu4 qing1 tan2" but these days, girls just doesn't like to cry. Everyone will only cry at home, in their room, in the toilet, when bathing... just prefer to cry alone. Even guys. I believe guys do cry lor... I dun believe tt they dun have tear glands. Hmmm... so wat's the whole pt? I forgot. I guess it's something like eh... crying = being weak? NO IT'S NOT! There's nothing wrong with crying, I luv to cry once a month (when I'm pmsing la... I'm not some siao za bor tt cries whenever I'm shuang) It helps to release frustration lor.

Crying is a form of gesture to show ur feelings, to show that u're upset, unhappy, disappointed, frustrated, depress or maybe u're overjoyed, relieved. I hate it when my mom say "dun cry until it seems as though someone died in the family" wah lau! who says we can only cry when someone pass away. People cry when watching touching movies, people cry when they received the desired results after tons of hardwork and I will cry even when I'm super hungry or in pain, not great pain but just pain. Haiya, so I'm a crybaby... SO? No one say u can't cry after reaching a certain age lor. But please do not hold crying sessions in schs cause tt's BIAN TAI!

Once again... there's nothing wrong with crying, it's ABSOLUTELY ALRIGHT to cry. And for now, I shall go cry over my unfortunate fate of being sick durin the long wkend. (P.S: I almost died in bed on sat frm fever, please send ur flowers and "get well soon" cards to my house asap. Tasty fruits are fine too... LOL!)

Being me.

2005-05-19T22:09:00.000+08:00

No one's perfect. I'm NO exception.

1) I'm NOT SMART
2) I luv to slack! I only mug in e morning cause I hate mugging at home.
3) I'm NOT NICE! I'm MEAN, sarcastic, harsh, dao... watever
4) I'm anti-social! YES I AM... I'm not shy, it's the anti-socialness in me
5) I luv to gossip. I dun care.
6) I swear. YES I DO. GOD DAMMIT
7) I'm NOISY! I luv to ramble on n on n on n on n on...........
8) I'm bu yao lian. TO A LARGE EXTENT
9) I'm a BAD girl. I smoke, I have a tattoo, I go clubbing, I take drugs... okie okie... those aren't true. I'm still guai
10) I'm just NOT the nice girl tt u all think I am. Neither am I weird alright. I do have a life which does not consist of school only.

Lastly, I miss ny n 0805!

Cool!

2005-05-14T22:34:00.000+08:00

Which Incredibles Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

WoOhOo~ More About MOI!

2005-05-13T18:24:00.000+08:00

The KeYs to YouR HeaRt

You are attracted to good manners and elegance.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need.
You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

The Idealist

You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world. Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close. But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop. You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

What's Your Personality Type?

You Are 16 Years Old

16

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

What Age Do You Act?

Your True Birth Month Is February

Sharp

Ambitious

Spendthrift

Loves reality

Loves freedom

Temperamental

Low self esteem

Honest and loyal

Abstract thoughts

Daring and stubborn

Changing personality

Showing anger easily

Intelligent and clever

Loves aggressiveness

Quiet, shy and humble

Learns to show emotions

Rebellious when restricted

Determined to reach goals

Superstitious and ludicrous

Dislikes unnecessary things

Realizing dreams and hopes

Too sensitive and easily hurt

Loves entertainment and leisure

Romantic on the inside not outside

Loves making friends but rarely shows it

What's Your True Birth Month?

CheeNa kiAz

2005-05-12T21:05:00.000+08:00

Just the day b4 during morning assembly, was standing beside this "prestigious" trip science class. The National Anthem started playing, voices rang high in the sky.

Suddenly! Giggling could be heard among the angelic voices of the Rafflesians *Not exactly angelic but just trying to act cheem* Eyes narrowed to the source of the giggles. Was some dumb guy.

After the National Anthem ended, I heard........

Dumb Guy: "Haha! So old already still sing the National Anthem."

Me (Thinking): DAMN YOU!

Five mins later... the RJ Harmonica went up to advertise for their concert. Nice harmonica tunes could be heard frm the speakers. I repeat... it's NICE, maybe not perfect but nice. Again, someone has to spoil the atmosphere.

Dumb Guy: "OMG! That was soooooo Chine-NAaAAAa!"

Classmate of Dumb Guy: "Cheena la..."

D.G: "Nope, it's Chine-NAaAaa. Yucks."

Classmates of Dumb Guy: "Hahahahaha"

Me (Thinking again): Damn all of u. Screw YOU (D.G) especially!

WTH is with this damn sch lor, or rather with 1/2 of Singapore. Labelling stuff as cheena or rather chine-NAAAAA. It's rude u noe. I can't help it if I'm proud of my roots n being a CHINESE. No matter wat alright, u're chinese urself too. So glamourous to be some potato izzit? Ppl r born ABCs but u? Please la... 100% chinese guy lor. (I'm currently pinpointing at Dumb Guy)

Saw him on stage today trying to get pple to vote for him to be in House Committee. DREAM ON F**KER! Den trying to act cool... act popular... act nice. TMD. 'Cause got this guy say, "Do vote for me blah blah blah House Com for Bayley"

"It's Bayley-WADDLE" girl audience spoke. (Cause bayley's RI's principal while waddle's rgs')

D.G: "Remember to vote for me blah blah blah bayley-WADDLE!" (pts at the guy b4 and sneered)

OMG LA. THAT WAS SO TMD LOR!!!

Back to the cheena stuff. Wat's wrong with being more comfortable with speaking chinese, listening to mandopop, reading chinese bks, watching chinese movies,etc? Wat's the PROBLEM?! Wat's so great abt English? English sounds cheem izzit? Den why izzit tt half of u complain tt Chinese language is DIFFICULT to grasp?! WTH. I can speak English AND mandarin. That's the whole point of the education system in sg rite? being bilingual? Wat's with the slang that 2/3 of those pple are trying to fake? Admit it la. Speaking standard English is gd but u absolutely have NO NEED for that slang rite?

Yar and I simply luv listening to u guys speak mandarin. WOOHOO! Laugh my head off!I mean it lor. I DESPISE those who just REFUSES to speak mandarin. I admit it alright, my English kinda suck but SO?! I still speak English in school, at home, when I'm out. I dun shun away~ plus I still believe my Mandarin's alright. I'm not effectively bilingual but I'm PROUD to say I can SPEAK BOTH languages. PLUS HOKKIEN! Hmph. Nothing wrong with noeing dialect k, I noe my roots =P Unlike some who are trying to grab the roots of the ANGMOHS. freaks.

YaY! I'm frm cheena sch (NyGh). SO?! I have BETTER ATTITUDE den most of those frm some PRESTIGIOUS top of the world Institution. I only criticize those ACT angmoh, act cool, act popular, act chio blah blah. I dun behave as though I own the world with tt stupid haughty look on my face. I may look dao but I dun have my nose high up in the air. Who cares abt u being in an english sch lor. WHO CARES.

I'm not going one big round to say chinese is gd or I'm great or watsoever. (Though I luv to think so... lol) but if u're CHINESE, u know yellow skin, black hair n stuff (in case u forgot), pls STOP saying everything is cheena or chine-NAAAa or watever cause tt's plain RUDE.

If u refuse to acknowledge tt u're chinese, pls dun eat chinese food esp. the hor fun n fried rice stall 3, during breaks. Go queue the western food store nxt to it. Leave the chinese food to ppl like ME! Dun even think of queueing the Malay or Indian food stores cause those are for pple who enjoys living in a multi-racial society (like ME again... LOL, I luv prata n nasi lemak!) NOT FOR ANGMOH KIAS who wish to live in western society.

I wouldn't say I'm cheena cause tt's degrading myself but I'm CHINESE! Hmph! If I hear another word frm the Dumb Guy frm 1S03* which makes me bushuang, he'll DIE frm my killer yan3 shen2. DAMN HIM once again.

P.S: Throughout this whole entry, I've been very kind to not mention his name. However, if u're so curious, esp if u're frm rJ, u can ask me when u see me n I'll point him out. Once again, DAMN U asshole! (Feeling vulgar. lol. supposed to be doing my GP. HAhaha)

Astrological Weight at Birth

2005-05-11T13:47:00.000+08:00

Your Astrological Weight at Birth is

Solar Birthdate = 22 Mar 1988
Lunar Birthdate = 5 Feb 1988

You are a good-hearted and intelligent person. Doing things efficiently will bring you to the attention of an influential person. Food and clothes in your life are yours by heaven luck. You do not need to work too hard to succeed. Place a wealth cat in the Southeast to bring you money luck. Also try to do some charity work to improve your store of good karma.

Astrological Weight at Birth (courtesy frm Jo's blog though she doesn't noe I gope frm her... hahah)

Being a traditional Chinese gal, I've always believed in these stuff. I'm superstitious. Even for horoscopes n stuff. I read the Chinese newspaper every week to check my horoscope. LOL but so far they've nv been really true. I think rite, EVERYONE needs a bit of fengshui, etc. to create a bit of luck ba.

Now I noe y I've no money luck.... cause I dun haf a wealth cat. Anyone care to spare one?

I think the topic on fengshui is actually very controversial ba... As wat my mother say, knowing tt u haf gd fengshui n luck, it brings peace to the mind and everything will go smoothly. So why not just believe in it?

I strongly believe that the other day when I was suey was due to bad karma so shall go do charity work asap. (Xinyu, if u're reading this... pls msg me to tell me when u're submitting the touch form den we can submit together under one email account. Yup!) Bad karma? Yes... cause I'm an EVIL gal! But lately, I've been guai ^_^

An entry tt's kinda rubbishy n makes no sense but it's pure entertainment for urs truly.

P.S: Today's Econs test was a HUGE disaster. DAMMIT. So was SPA. DAMMIT again. Why didn't I think of the fact tt I have to take tests which are of sky scraping standard when I chose this damn school.

List of Exciting stuff to do

2005-05-04T14:49:00.000+08:00

Things I need to do:
1. F Maths Tutorial B - 3D Trigonometry

2. F Maths Tutorial A - Curve Sketching

3. F Maths Revision Tutorial 1 - Functions, Graphs n Transformation (My "fav")

4. Physics Tutorials
i) Forces
ii) Dynamics
iii) Work, Energy n Power

5. PW research (Go library...)

6. GP Application Question

7. Study for F Maths lecture test - Trigo, Summation, Mathematical Induction

8. Practise piano

9. Practise guitar

10. Econs TYS

11. Study for Econs lecture test (which I guess should be everything I've learnt so far?)

12. F Maths Assignment A6 - Applications of Differentiation

13. F Maths Assignment B5 - Mathematical Induction

14. PW journal (which is crap. why can't we just write whenever we feel like writing n not force us to write every week. I dun have THAT much thots n feelings)

15. GP Performance Task (Yay, I finally can speak during GP~)

Yar, those are the ONLY stuff I have to do today and tmr and the weekend. How nice... I so luv my busy life... I absolutely luv MATHS! screw maths... yucks. And dun blame the teachers, it's just me who kept procrastinating... (I realised RJ teachers do read their students' blogs. OMG! But I think somehow they can't link to mine... HAHAHAH!!!)

Wat am I still doing here? I have no idea.

I think I lack originality n creativity cause this entry is BORING n so NOT original...